The physical and emotional pressures of looking after a new baby strike all mums. Exhaustion and self-doubt are part of the deal of early motherhood. The ‘baby blues’ in various forms affects 50% of new mums but lasts for only a few days after the birth. Post-natal depression – or post-natal illness (PNI) as it’s also termed – affects one in 10 mums and can last for weeks or months.
How do you know if you’ve got post-natal depression?
The symptoms are multiple and each significant in themselves. They include:
*Irritability.
*Tearfulness.
*Low self-esteem and despair.
*Anxiety and panic attacks.
*Headaches.
*Sleeplessness.
*Difficulty bonding with the baby.
These symptoms are not intermittent or manageable, as they would be for most mums. They are overwhelming and incapacitating.
Who is at risk of post-natal depression?
Circumstances and genetic susceptibility make some women more vulnerable than others to post-natal depression. Those who are at higher risk include mums who have:
*Had difficulty getting pregnant, especially over a long period.
*Had relationship problems with the baby’s dad.
*Suffered a recent bereavement.
*Been depressed previously.
*Lost their own mothers during childhood.
*Had a baby who has been unwell.
What can you do about it?
The most important thing is to seek help. Although in this state of mind it’s easy to become isolated, women who talk to someone have a much better prospect of recovery. It’s best to speak to your GP or health visitor.
Otherwise, you can contact one of the many support groups for post-natal depression (see below). But talking to other mums can help too. If you don’t have close friends to talk to, contact Meet a Mum (www.mama.co.uk)
Those for whom the talking cure isn’t enough may need medical support.
‘The thing to realise about PNI is that treatment will make you feel better,’ says Liz Wise, a counsellor who‘s worked with women suffering from PNI for the past 12 years (www.postnataldepression.com). ‘Getting help early on can shorten the amount of time that you suffer PNI.’ Common treatments for PNI are counselling and antidepressants.
Modern antidepressants aren’t addictive and many can be taken while breastfeeding. Mums with PNI are also advised to start doing activities that reinforce their sense of identity, whether that’s having a massage, taking up singing lessons or going swimming regularly.
Seeking help
New motherhood is supposed to be a time of joy and looking forward to the future. When women don’t feel that, they often have a sense of failure. So it’s not surprising that getting women to seek help in the first place is a big problem. Health visitors now ask new mums to answer a questionnaire, called the Edinburgh Scale, which can help to predict PNI. But a recent survey by the BBC revealed that 44% of women lie in this test, pretending to be more confident and upbeat than they really are.
‘It’s down to what I call the myth of perfect parenting,’ says author and former suffer, 42. ‘We’re all told, repeatedly, how wonderful motherhood is. No-one likes to admit that sometimes it isn’t all tummy-kissing and bonding; that sometimes we feel like being far away from our kids!’ Although she couldn’t bond with her children her daughters, Georgina, now 16, and Tasha, now 12, at all, they later became a happy family.
Rachael Taplin, 35, is mum to Annabel, 5. ‘I began to slide into depression a few weeks after Annabel was delivered by emergency caesarean section in January 2001.
‘The irony was, I’d tried for two years and was about to start fertility treatment when I conceived naturally and when I held Annabel for the first time, I was besotted with her. But I tried to be a supermum.
‘Of course, you can’t control everything and you can’t do everything. Soon I felt anxious and overwhelmed. I’d planned to mention it at my six-week check-up, but when my health visitor cancelled because she thought I was doing well, I felt ashamed to admit I wasn’t coping.’
Can you prevent PND?
Not entirely as it’s unpredictable, but certain measures will drastically reduce your risk:
*Get as much support around you as possible for when your baby arrives.
*Don’t put too much pressure on yourself.
*Don’t undertake any major life changes, such as moving house, at the time.
*Rest as much as you can.
*If you feel low, even for a few days, talk to your GP or health visitor.
Do you need help?
If you answer TRUE to three or more of the following questions, have a chat with your GP or health visitor.
*In the past week, I haven’t really laughed or been able to see the funny side of things. TRUE/FALSE?
*I don’t feel able to look forward to things at the moment. TRUE/FALSE?
*If I won a big cash prize or a holiday, I still don’t feel that would cheer me up. TRUE/FALSE?
*Even when I have the chance, I haven’t been sleeping well. TRUE/FALSE?
*I’ve been feeling scared and panicky for no real reason. TRUE/FALSE?
*I’ve found myself crying for no particular reason. TRUE/FALSE?
For more info
If you need more information or help with PNI, these organisations can help:
*Association for Postnatal Illness (www.apni.org, 020 7386 0868)
*MIND (www.mind.org.uk) for information and facts.
*Perinatal Illness UK (www.pnisha.org.uk) has online message boards, plus a helpline and support groups.
*Royal College of Psychiatrists (www.rcpsych.ac.uk) has their leaflet on PNI online.
*Home Start (www.home-start.org.uk) is a charity offering practical support for mums suffering PNI.
*www.pni.org.uk.
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Surviving Postnatal Depression by Cara Aiken (Jessica Kingsley, £15.95) from www.amazon.co.uk
