Controlled crying method of getting your baby to sleep

What controlled crying is, the pros and cons of this baby settling method and how to start using the controlled crying technique.

Posted: 11 February 2011
by Siobhan O’Reilly and Sarah MacKenzie

Controlled crying can be tough on you

The controlled crying technique isn’t advised before your baby’s 6 months of age. With controlled crying, after putting your baby into her cot awake, you leave progressively longer periods between visits to reassure her, until she settles herself.

The controlled crying method usually takes only a few nights to work, but requires an iron will.

How to start the controlled crying technique

STEP 1: Put your baby in her cot awake, say goodnight to her, and then leave the room.

STEP 2: If she cries, wait 5 minutes before going in. Stay for a few minutes to reassure her, then say goodnight and leave the room.

STEP 3: If she’s still crying after 5 more minutes, go back in and repeat the process. This time, wait for 10 minutes before going back in, and extend the time between visits by 2 minutes until she falls asleep.

Positive of controlled crying

It’s quick, usually taking just a few nights.

Downsides of controlled crying

All your parenting instincts tell you to go and comfort your crying baby, so you need an iron will.
Your baby will feel abandoned and some experts believe this may have an effect later on in life.

What if controlled crying doesn’t work for you and your baby?

Don’t worry. If it’s not happening and you can’t persist, have a break before you try again.

Other sleep methods to consider

controlled crying, sleep, sleep techniques, settling techniques, baby sleep habits, sleep routine

So what do you think?

Graham Kennedy
Hi, thanks for this post. It is not often that the positives and negatives of controlled crying are mentioned. About 2 years ago

Charmaine
I do think teaching your child to be able to fall asleep on there own & in their own bed is a postive thing however the true version of controlled crying is far to harsh for me to deal with

I did a tamer version of it, you still have to leave baby to cry, the HV advised me this is partly fraustration as they actually dont know how to fall asleep on their own. But you leave baby, for two mins, after two mins you go in, sooth them, dont pick them up and avoid eye contact, no real talking, as soon as they calm down you say night again walk out the door and never leave them more than two mins, so they are not frigtened or feeling alone - I felt much happier doing htis verison, and after seven months on near on no sleep, harry was sleeping thro the night - on is own. Apparently if a child does not fall asleep on their own when they wake, they need to go back to sleep the same way, fed, rocked etc.. however if htey fall asleep on their own when they stir, they turn over and know how to go back to sleep all by theirself - a good life skill I think
This may not work for all and it was tough but it didnt take long and he got it! I could never have left him five mins and longer!
Good luck to anyone trying it About 2 years ago