My wee boy is 10 weeks old and is a wee star at night ( so I know i should not complain) I only have to get up twice to settle him and dont have to feed through the night. Through the day he has become very clingy and wont settle to sleep unless on me. (he has colic too). He has begun to sleep occassionally in his bouncy chair, where i can rock him if he stirs, but for such a wee boy he is not getting nearly enough sleep.
Its so tying having him constantly sat on me, so we have decided to try controlled crying to see if it helps him settle in his cot trhough the day, he goes down wide awake at night and settles himself so i know he can do it!
So i am in the middle of trying this now, so far ive had to go in four times to settle him and he has now been quiet for about 5 mins,
Anyone got any tips on how they have done this , how it works, or any other advice? First time mum-stressed!!
thanks xxxxxx :\)
oh dear crying again!! 6 mins.....
it is really hard to hear your babe cry, isn't it!
just keep at it, and when he becomes used to it, he should hopefully be ok.
why are you going in at night to settle him if he doesnt need feeding? it may be that he is used to you, and thinks he needs you then, so he needs you in the day?
maybe try and see if he can settle himself in the night too?
my first was a nightmare with sleeping - day, night, but i let him win by going into him. with my others, i've let them cry (not hysterically) and they usually go back off after a few mins.
i hope he settles soon
xxxxxx
Hi there
Definatley persevere with it, my little boy had never slept thru until last week (he's nearly 9 months!!), and we had 3 nights of controlled crying and now we've had 5 nights of 11 hours sleep YEAH!!!
It's hard I know but crying won't do them any harm, so leave for 5 mins, then leave for 10mins and so on. Also does your baby have a dummy because Shea kept waking and wanting his that had fallen out so now I leave about 6 dummies around his cot, so if he wakes he can find one!.
Also have you got black out curtains or blinds? I find these really useful during hte day, to block out all the light.
Hope it works for you and be strong, because hearing them cry is hard but your're not being cruel
xxx
thank you! after going in 5 times he slept for 20 mins! now almost feeding time. he wakes and cries through the night so i usually go in give him his dummy and then he falls asleep again. would it be better to let him cry for a few minutes before i go in for the first time? xx
most definatley!! Thats the mistake I made, going in straight away, and they are little buggers who learn very very quickly that if I cry mummy will be there straight away!!
Leave him for a few minutes to see if he settles before going in. My lo often wakes up as he moves about a lot, and generally gets his stuck sideways in the cot!! So I know if he doesn't stop within a few minutes I need to go in, turn him round , then he'll settle.
As I said before, several dummies are good so if it is that he wants he can always find one, can he pop his dummy in on his own yet?
good luck tonight
i had a dummy with my first due to the crying in his sleep - probably more for me than him, but i think in the long run, it made it worse for us both. he'd cry when it fell out, yet when i'd go in, he'd be in the same position, not even trying to find it. he didnt have it by 10months tho', as i'd had enough of getting up, my husband snoring, and saying "he had a good night last night, didnt he"!!!. i went cold turkey for a few nights, he got the hang of it, and no problems since!!
you could try either way, loads so he can find them, or with none. you need to see which works better for you both.
i had a dummy with my first due to the crying in his sleep - probably more for me than him, but i think in the long run, it made it worse for us both. he'd cry when it fell out, yet when i'd go in, he'd be in the same position, not even trying to find it. he didnt have it by 10months tho', as i'd had enough of getting up, my husband snoring, and saying "he had a good night last night, didnt he"!!!. i went cold turkey for a few nights, he got the hang of it, and no problems since!!
you could try either way, loads so he can find them, or with none. you need to see which works better for you both.
hiya,i used controlled crying for my lo,it was soooo hard at first and you have to be so strong but it really does work in the end! it took primrose about 4 nights and then slept rite through she is 22mnths now and still the same it was my lifesaver! x
thank you, its reassuring to know i am going the right way. He cant put his own dummy in yet, so perhaps we should try taking it away!! He never gets hysterical trhough the night, just a moany cry so yeah i am prob getting up too quick! And as for hubby saying he slept well, i get that too! AGGHHH!!!! Men! lol
if he has his dummy in when he goes to bed and then it comes out when hes gone to sleep thats fine,i made the mistake of allways putting prims back in everytime and she got wise to me doing that!so i stopped it also giving them a dummy to help them off to sleep reduses the risks of cotdeath too.xx
Last night was good, only woke once through the night, and settled very quickly, left him for a while himself. Almost fell asleep in his bouncy chair so i thought i should put him up to bed, to keep routine going. Woke of course!! Hope he will get to sleep as he is exhauted. xxxx
fell asleep after half an hour but woke 10 mins later! Should the controlled crying help him to sleep longer too? He never used to do this, on me he will sleep for hours!!!
i've read that by promoting good sleep at night, helps for longer sleeps during the day too. i have found this to be true for me, but i dont know how much of this is research based.
as i posted above, my first was a nightmare at night, and did what i call "cat naps" - 10-15 mins only during day.
with my 2nd & 3rd, i have put them both in the cot during the day, and both slept for a good spell, and settled very quickly at night. i haven't had any concerns with them not going to sleep anywhere but bed either - many a time they have fallen asleep on the floor when playing, in the car seat, pram etc.
however, this of course worked for me!!
i have seen posts on here where people have been told to keep this "day & night" thing - only in cot, curtains shut at night, left downstairs, with TV in bouncer / crib / pram during day.
i think you may have to see what works best for you with either of these.
thanks might be worth a go as he got so upset!!
tried controlled crying yesterday and after about 6 times of going back in he fell asleep but for 20 mins only and wouldnt settle after.
today tried again and he slept for 10, then woke then 6 then woke. doesnt matter how long i leave him he only settles when i go back in. do you think he could be too young to sleep in his room? cant see why as he is fine at night!!!!! wonder whether to try pram? he slept on monday in his bouncy chair from 9 till 11 which was fab. he just seems to get so distraught being on his own!!! we started at 830 this morning as he was falling asleep downstairs, just got him up now at 1015 but wants to sleep on me! agh!!!!!!!!
any further thoughts/tips/ideas welcome!!!
trying again this afternoon with nap. on to 4th time and now leaving him 20 mins. He did fall asleep to begin with for 20 mins but has cried for almost 40 mins now! I feel as though its never going to work, aghh!!
it's all trial and error really, to see what works best for you.
My lo would sleep for hours on me, or in bed with me, but not on his own, but I didn't want to get into that routine as I had to go back to work and didn't want him too dependent on me, but if it works for you then let him sleep on you. There are no right and wrongs.
Has he ever slept for long during day as my little boy has NEVER napped for longer than an hour, unless he's been ill or something. Shea is just a light sleeper and doesn't want to miss out on anything during the day - he's too nosey to sleep for hours!! Which my HV tells me is a good thing in the respect that he'll probably be a bright button!!
Some babies just don't want as much sleep as others.
Shea's 9 months now, and gets about 11hours at night and two to three 3/4hours naps during day but it took us months and months to get into this routine. It will get better I promise
xx
until 2 or 3 weeks ago he would sleep all afternoon in his basket or cot, then one day it just changed. He slept in his chair tonight, we have decided maybe controlle crying is not right for him, he cried for 2 hours this afternoon and then fell asleep within 5 mins of getting a cuddle! Just dont feel its fair on him as he was clearly tired. Almost like he is afraid to be alone.
They say not to use controlled crying until 6 months! Just so you know, cos the baby won't understand it earlier than that!
yeah i dont think he does understand it! He just keeps crying. and they say at his age he is just starting to learn that he and i are seperate beings and that he depends on me. So when he cries when i leave the room he is perhaps afraid that i wont come back. maybe we need to work on that first. He is sleeping in his pram fine today. i think he likes the noise and to know i am going about and he is nto on his own. xxxx