This may turn into a long post & I don't really know where to start so thank you in advance for reading & sorry if I ramble!

Ellie is now 17 & a half months old.
Until she was 13 months we lived at home with my Mum so Ellie was in my room.

From an early age she didn't eat or sleep well & I ended up having her in bed with me most nights so as not to disturb my Mum & brother who both lived there too.

When we moved out in April I decided it would be a new start & as she had her own room she would be going into it. For the first couple of weeks she slept in bed with me in the new flat then I started giving her her night time bottle in my room, letting her fall asleep & putting her into the cot.
This eventually progressed to feeding her in my room then putting her into the cot & doing CC until she went to sleep.
Within a few weeks she was in a great routine, went to my room & took a bottle then into her own room with her mobile on & she put herself over to sleep.

The middle of June in the same week I started work, Ellie started nursery & we had mice in the flat.
Due to the mice & my fear of them not to mention the dirt, we temporarily stayed with her Dad as him & I were trying the relationship again to see how it went.
We stayed there for about a week then went home & within a few nights Ellie was back in her routine of going to bed BUT she NEVER slept the night through in her cot, always woke at some point & in my sleepy haze I brought her into my bed-half the times I didn't realise I had even done so until I woke up the next morning :\?.

Anyway we were on holiday the last week in August for a week & there was a travel cot in the apartment which she slept in for a total of 5 hours the whole time we were there.
I gave it a by ball as we were on holiday but had decided when we came home I was taclking her sleeping issues once & for all.

We got home 2 sunday's ago & went into the flat to find another dead mouse in my kitchen :\(.
I was so upset & phoned my mum who said we could stay with her for a few days.

As we've now been with her for nearly 2 weeks Ellie's routine has been non-existent & as i'm planning on going home on friday I decided that sunday night wold be the start of me getting her sorted out & I would then carry on when we get home.

Well sunday night was a disaster she wasn't asleep until after 11pm & that was after CC for 30 mins & her making herself sick. On Monday night she cried for 45 mins before eventually falling asleep but no sickness.
Last night my mum fed her her bottle & she fell asleep before 8pm & Mum sat with her on her knee for about 30 mins then I put her into the cot. She slept until 1.20am when she woke & screamed until I gave her a bottle then settled down.
Tonight she was exhausted, I gave her supper, bathed her & then gave her a bottle & put her into the cot. She screamed & screamed & 2 mins after I walked out of the room she threw up everywhere.

I am completely at the end of my tether, she is a cling on- I can do nothing without her clinging to my legs or crying until I lift her etc. I know I shouldn't give in but I am a single parent & it is very difficult not to just lift her to stop her crying.
As for the feeding through the night she eats so little during the day that she does seem to be generally hungry through the night, draining a 7oz bottle & going back to sleep immediately after.

She's 17 months old & should not be like this especially the middle of the night feed but I really, really do not know what to do!

We go home to the flat on friday & i'm up to high doe worrying about that as it is let alone worrying about what Ellie is going to be like & I really, really need some help & some ideas as to what I should do!
I'm going to speak to my HV tomorrow & have her weighed & see if there's any sort of supplement she can give me to keep her from wakening through the night but as regards to the sleeping, the vomiting when doing CC & the seperation anxiety if i move an inch away from her please help!!

PS I award you all medals if you finish this lol :lol:

I'll have a medal please!!

I really feel for you for all the problems you've had. Obviously all the upheavel (none your fault) has upset her and probably made her anxious.

With her sleep issue I would start at the beginning. Put her to bed and stay with her until she falls asleep. No eye or verbal contact, just stay in the room. No matter how long it takes. Once this is established and she goes to sleep a lot quicker, begin to move further out the room. Maybe standing in the doorway so she can see you, then eventually start moving away. If she is still screaming when you are out the room, go in re-settle then leave. the vomiting is an attention thing, so if she still vomits you need to clean everything up with no fuss (hard I know). Do not reward her with attention for vomiting. Easier said than done I know, but she's at the age when she knows how to manipulate you.

I don't know if any of the above will help, I'm no expert but parts of it I've had to do (not the vomiting problem), and it has worked.

Eating problem - if it is that bad ask your HV if you can be referred to a nutritionist or dietician for help with your daughter's eating. I have a fussy eater but not as bad as you. the waking for a bottle in the night needs to be nipped in the bud. She may be hungry, but she can also be doing it out of habit.

Sorry if I've rambled a bit
hth x

medal & a choccie biccy for you lol
thanks for your reply hon, can't believe someone actually read it to the end.

i think i am going to have to do this & it sounds like a far better idea than bunging her in the cot & walking away. thank you.

yeah in regards to her eating she was referred to a consultant at about 9 months who said there was nothing wrong with her but she's 17 months & weighs about 18lbs bt it's not just that she's slight she just doesn't eat!

anyway thanks again babe i will definitely be trying this when we get home xx

Can I have a medal too :lol: I think that sitting with her while she falls asleep is definitely a good plan, once she is happy with that you can gradually let move further away untill you are out of the room.
With regards to the feeding, is it possible that the reason she doesn't eat well in the day is because she is taking so much milk at night? I'm not an expert on bottles (my two were/are bfed) but could you maybe try gradually watering down her night time bottles, so if you are say making up 6 oz only use 5 scoops of formula, then after a few days only 4 scoops etc, and see if this helps make her hungrier during the day. It sounds like she might have got into the habit of relying on the milk for calories rather than eating during the day.
Hope it goes well for you hun.
xx

Just to add Charlotte is 20 months and at last weigh in just over a week ago was 20lb 13oz so your lo's weight isn't that bad really x

I have just read the toddler section of the baby whisperer and it is very good and may help you.

I feel for you both, your lo because she's been so disrupted and you because you are on your own and disrupted!

My hubbie works long hours and sometimes I feel like a single mum (!) and while my lo generally sleeps ok, she is clingy (to my leg etc..) and I know what you mean about not being able to ignore it. I always pick her up!

I too would suggest trying to wean her off the nightime bottle. My lo doesn't have any milk because she won't drink it and still sleeps through. She does eat well in the day though.
You could be in a catch 22 situation though - she has the milk because she doesn't eat much but doesn't eat much because she has the milk so that may be the place to start.
Perhaps once you have been succesful at that, you can carry on with CC. I think she is making herself sick because she has just had milk and then cries and gets hot and worked up. Or try giving her the milk half an hour to an hour before bed?

Try the baby whisperer website hun - it may help.

xx