[Modified by: wannanother on 05 August 2010 19:26:46 ]

I'd tell them to sod off!!! Even my mum asks before she gets my lo's out of their pram in case they have been put down for a nap or anything. I don't think it matters how nice they are or how well you know them, it is good manners to ask before manhandling some one elses children. Not sure how you could tell them without causing offence though.
xx

I agree Bedhead, especially if the baby isn't crying and even if he was they should STILL ask if it's ok to pick him up!! How bloody rude!!

I understand where you are coming from! I personally wouldnt like anyone doing this and it sounds like you need to say something pretty quickly before it goes any further!

I had a similar instance in the doctors last week when a man tried to take Tommy out of my arms "because his daughter liked babies" I said no pretty firmly but found myself explaining that it was because he was about to have his injections and was grouchy! I should not have had to explain why I wouldnt hand my baby to a complete stranger but I did feel he would accuse me of being racist if I didnt! I felt really uncomfortable in that position so to have it done regularly every week must drive you nuts!

Hope it goes well when you tell them hon!

Love Lee
xxxxx

thanks everyone..
im glad its not just me whos a bit weird not wanting people to have my baby!

i think that i do need to nip it in the bud now, before it goes on longer and it would seem more weird if they suddenly werent allowed to do it.

the mum of the family is really kind of pushy outgoing personality id say, so it would be hard to say anything to her, i prob could deal with the teenagers ok, but not the mum...she would make me feel silly if i didnt let her kind of thing (altho hopefullly not intentionally). i am very shy and only really speak up when i know people well, so she prob just thinks i would never say anything to her so she just takes him cause im too much of a wimp to say.

can anyone think of any good things i can say to stop them??

like excuses/reasons/ways i can get them to know that they should ask to take him, and if i say no then i mean no..x

Oh no, i'd hate this! Even my mum asks me if she can hold him! If it were me i'd wait until they went to get him out next time and just politely say "oh, he's been getting a bit grumpy with overstimulation around people at the moment, so would you mind asking if you want to pick him up, then I can let you know if he's a bit too tired. I don't mind you having cuddles sometimes, just when he's going to be ok with it or it's hard to settle him"

With my LO this is true anyway as people find out when they pick him up without warning, heehee. I usually get him straight back.

xxx

I would hate it!!! And I think if I was in your position I would take my lo in her baby carrier so that no-one could take her out of her pram! Next time, just politely say, please can you ask before taking her out of the pram - if they are really nice people they shouldn't mind!

My mil in law has started to 'snatch' my lo from my arms - my dh noticed it on sunday after I complained to him abit it after they visited on thurs...grrr.....throuble is that I wont want to see them with her if she's going to be like that!

You're not one bit weird for not wanting anyone to pick up your LO without asking! You also shouldn't have to make up an excuse, I know it can be hard especially in a new environment but the next time one of them tries to pick him up just say that it is OK for them to hold him but that you would prefer if they asked first. If they don't like it it's their problem not yours .

hi thanks everyone its just hard cause we are just new there and we do really like the church. im just scared we hurt their feelings if thats them just being nice..but it really does annoy me and its now causing me to prefer to not bring him, last week i had him sitting on my knee and (the same woman) said "let me see ma boy" and just took him of my knee!!

it was one of those things where i only thought of what i shouldve said after the event!

another time a diff woman i had never met saw me holding him and said "oh can i nurse the baby?" (weird way of saying it for a start, but at least she asked)..and then i didnt really want her too as i was about to give him his lunch so i quickly said " oh i was about to give him his lunch sorry"..and she said "oh i dont mind doing that" and took him out my arms!!

so off i went to get his jar and gave it to her and had to sit there while this woman id never even met fed my baby!!!

Oh thats out of order. I wouldn't let anyone take Cole out of his pram without asking - not even my friends or family do. As for people I barely know..then that would really creep me out. I think you need to put a stop to it now before everyone starts thinking its ok to do it.

Could you maybe claim he's going through a clingy stage and you'd rather they left him be? Or that he's just got over a cold and you don't want anyone picking him up cause you don't want him to catch anything else..

good luck sorting them out!!

I'm absolutely astonished that these people feel that this is an acceptable thing to do!

You need to put a stop to it starting this Sunday. You shouldn't have to explain your reasons & who really cares what they think- they didn't care what you thought when they lifted your baby without permission!

My daughter is weird with strangers & she would be petrified if someone she didn't know did this & to be honest I WOULD TOO!!

Nip it in the bud before it goes any further xo

Your right to be annoyed, I would be furious if anyone picked Nathan out of his pram without asking, its really rude. Dont feel bad about telling them to leave him alone, he's your baby after all.
xx

We have the same thing happening to us when me & oh go into our local pub in the afternoon, only reason we take jason in is coz we've known the land lady for ages! any way.....

don't mind her picking jason up out of his pram n all that coz she is a mate but you get other people going in there who we don't even know but have got kids n they try n take im out of his pram without saying anything. nearly smacked this woman the other week coz as i was passing jason to oh she just stood straight in front of him n grabbed jason off me!!!! n i didnt even know her!!!! then he even had the ficking cheek to lecture me about biting my bloody nails n grabbed my hand trying to show me her "beautiful" nails, if it hadn't've bin for oh i'd've floored her.

God it annoys me when people just think oh baby it's ok to touch! how are we supposed to know they're not going to run off with our lo's?

& to add i know a church is different than a pub but it's the principal that counts

I don't think its acceptable for people to just pick baby up without asking! Same as some of the other ladies, even my family ask if its ok to pick Dylan up!
I think its just unfair on the LO, especially if they are quite happy & settled. Definately, mention it to the culprits next time, maybe just saying LO is due a nap or something.
Sarah xx