health visitors

has anyone actually got a nice health visitor (or midwife for that matter), i seem to have had the most useless midwifes and rude health visitors (even changed them but the new ones were as bad) or is it me just being unlucky? we said if we have another child (very unlikely though) we will not have a nhs midwife or a health visitor

God hvs are my big bug too!!
mine was actually quite nice when she was on visits but it bugged me that she hada child same age as mine and yet still talked like a text book!!!! She was the one that discovered amber was intollerant to breastmilk and i'm grateful for that but after that she was completly useless and unwilling to help or advise, i haven't seen her since amber was 9 weeks old (despite Amber still having severe intollerances) !!!

I go along to the baby clinics or see a lovely hv at our local surestart, i've learnt to be very choosy which hv i talk too!

my health clinic and local sure start is ran by the same health visitors!

My midwife is amazing, she really fought my corner with my last pregnancy when I swelled up like a cactus in the rainy season!!!!

My sure start midwife is also amazing, but is on maternity leave until September!

As some of you already know I can't stand my HV. She is the biggest "jobs worth" i have ever had the misfortune to meet!! There are a couple of people on the team who I like and get on with but the rest treat me like a paranoid first time mother, and those of you who know me well know that I am pretty relaxed and chilled out!!

My midwife and health visitor were both realy nice and full of helpful info when needed.
My midwife helped me try different ways of brestfeeding,glad she did or i would have given up,and my H.V.was the best going,she has seen riley through all the ups and dwns and even was HV to chan when we had her,but sadly she retired just after christmas and i dont think anyone could be just as good.

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I had a visit from my HV this week. She's moving jobs so wont see me again and she said she would see me before she goes, so I was expecting a visit from her. When she came she was doing the 7 month assesment on the twins. They were not quite 6.5 months. She asked the usual questions, head contol, rolling over, vision/hearing check. Then asked about if they were sitting. I said they arnt even close, then she lectured me on how i should sit with them on the floor to help their posture. She asked about their vocalising, Nina had just started that week end, but jack was still just screeming or giggling, no talking noises, then hey presto he does it. Then she asked if they were baring weight in their legs, no hope of that. And if I'd started lumpy foods yet, as they are 'getting to that stage', and a reminder of what foods i can cook for them... ARGH.
I have a 16 month old who wont eat anything unless its covered in tomato sauce, or shaped like spagetti hoops, and she is telling me all about the virtues of cooking for the twins. The said that she would have to arrange a visit in 4-6 weeks as they hadnt met the development points. But kept saying that I was really calm about it all. I dont want them doing too much to soon, not when i have one still falling over everything. I dont have time to spend sitting on the floor, theres 3 times as many bottles/nappies/laundry/beds to make/meals to make than everyone else and she's expecting minor miricles out of my twins. It meade me feel more than inadequet (sp) to say the least.

Everyone I've ever spoken to about twins (not to mention a toddler too) has said it takes them longer to do things, but shes expecting them to reach 7 month development points at 6 and a half months!!!!

Sorry for the essay/rant but HV should practice what they preach, every baby is diferent and sometimes getting from breakfast to bedtime, without major injury, is an acheivement.

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Sally, it sounds like we could share the same HV!!!!

Bronwyn is over 7 months old and we've not had any contact about her checks yet, joy of joys i have that to come!!!

my health visitor ignored my concernes with my oldest as i was a first time paronoid mother etc, turns out hes autistic. my midwife ignored my consernes with my second pregnancy, i kept getting bad headaches and felt something just wasnt quite right with the pregnancy in the end there was no movement and he was stillborn, and now my health visitor is passing me off about isaac crying all the time, i even had to record it on my phone and play it to her when she came round, its took 9months to get a refferal to a pediatrician!

By the sounds of it i am very lucky. My hv is an absolute star and is always there if we need her. I was really worried about meeting the dreaded hv when Hollie was small as i know some are very pro b/feeding but also very fussy on weight gain. Mine hasn't bothered with Hollie's weight and has never forced her opinions on us. She is very nice to talk to and when we see her she doesn't just recite things from a book.
We have Hollie's 6 month development check on wednesday so i am interested to see how that goes. But i do know Hollie is developing at her own rate an that is all i can ask for.

My midwife on the other hand was useless. I never saw the same midwife twice when pregnant except that the last appointment i had before the birth was with the same mw who came to the house after Hollie was born. There was a staff shortage and i really found it hard as i didnt bond with my mw. And the one that came to the house told me that she expected me to quit b/feeding in the first few days. Nice to know i had her support.

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sounds like i have been unlucky, i wanted to breastfeed isaac but was offered no support or encouragement so he was put straight on the bottle. and while i was pregnant id had no movement for a whole day, bearing in mind i was a high risk pregnancy due to my stillbirth, i rang the midwife about no movement and she replied'and what do you want me to do about it' i said 'i want you to get off you f****** arse and get out here and check!', in the end even the consultant who was looking after me at the hospital said he wasnt happy with my care and took over, she didnt even notice!

By the sounds of it my hv is ok. She lives in the real world and gives advice that you can see is from her having children as opposed to reading it in a book. Sorry to hear some of you have horrible times with yours and i agree with sally, sometimes getting thro the day is an acheivement in itself

Its a bit of a lottery when it comes to midwives and hv's! I live in a deprived area and with it being in rural lincolnshire we have a very limted support network!!

It would appear that each area has their own developmental check stages. I have been told that its 8 months in this area, I was expecting a 7 month check up!!! A bonus is that it won't be the HV that does the check. woooo hoooo!!!

We don't get a 7 month check in this area any more. The midwifes and hv's are pretty much useless. I remember when I had Luka and she was doing a first home visit, I was sat talking to her with my back to Tate whilst he was in the highchair, he wasn't strapped in and decided that that would be the moment he would leap from his chair!!! The HV could see what he was doing and didnt say a word. I think they want you to be a problem family maybe!!! I think she was waiting for an accident to happen. I was so shocked luckily I noticed just in time.

And don't get me started on the midwives!!!

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Sally, Claire and Caroline I am sorry that you health visitors aren't good. I think we all deserve help from a decent hv. Mine I have to say is great, but we do not need to see her anymore as kids too old. Can you change and have someone else in the practice take over?

Nicola that is shocking that she didnt even think about mentioning it to you. And if he had fallen she would have been the first one to report you, that is terrible. I am very lucky with mine and she adores Hollie too, although Hollie doesnt like her lol.

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tell me about it! The other week i went to the baby clinic and after i'd stripped luka off to be weighed i realised I had left his clean nappy and wipes in the bottom of the buggy. I asked the hv to watch him on the changing table please. She said ok. As I walked over to the buggy he started to roll she just watched him and then said to me 'oh that was lucky he didn't fall off'!!! That was a different hv but they all seem to be like that! Instills no sense of confidence at all.

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Really nicola, yet they are the first ones to moan if that was you that had watched and said that.

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maybe this wont sound nice but im happy that im not alone.
my midwife- i dont think i can say i had one because i have never seen the same midwife. if i was to have another baby,i would only go private.
and my health visitor seemed quite nice, the thing is I only saw her once when Seb was few weeks old.
at the baby clinic which is run by sure start are 3 hv, all useless.so i only go to the clinic to weigh Seb. although last time they said they have a new rule: i have to see the hv every time i come. so i think i wont go anymore.
if i have a question i talk to my mum,my grandad who is a doctor or to you girls.
i do go to gp if seb is not well. I have been to gp last week because seb is constipated and she told me to give him some baby cereal with honey. i think she forgot that babies not suppose to eat honey until they are 1.so now im changing my gp...

me and my other half have said we will only go private if we have another child, i dislike midwifes with a passion it seems like they do the minimal amount of work to avoid getting the sack. they dismissed my concerns with my second son and he was stillborn, so obviously i was right that something was wrong

God thats so awful, sorry things are so bad. I really want to train as a midwife but just hearing how things are puts me off. my exp was ok but could of been so much better and i'd like to think that i could maybe help other women have a great birth exp as i know now how it is. Not sure just one person would make that much of a difference tho