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11/01/2011 at 14:51
11/01/2011 at 22:07
Buster,just wanted to say,after having number 3 I'd like more,but big fella not keen,and I often wonder same thing...........Hope Jo sees your post she is expecting her 8th,lucky lady!
Another friend of mine has 9 children between 16 and 3 and her husband said no after number 3,me thinks he doth protest to quietly!!!!!!!
Let us know how you re-aproach subject with hubby,similar situation myself x
11/01/2011 at 22:29
Just had a teary discussion this evening, basically he wants to know why I want more. Not sure I know the answer!
8 or 9 is a real bunch!! How does your friend fit them in her house? That's the only thing worrying me, room.
12/01/2011 at 09:21
I really dont know how you ladies do it, I feel exhausted with just one, I am 38 next month and want to shed a little more weight and try for another but I am scared that I wont cope with being so tired and all the terrible nights sleep etc. I think the older you get the more difficult it gets too. Also it took five years to concieve harry and I think I am trying to keep my expectations down so I am not disappointed if it doesnt happen as I dont think I would want to be pregnant after 40
I take my hat of too you,
12/01/2011 at 10:54
I have 4 children. We had Christine, Robert and Sarah, and I always wanted another, but he said no as the house we lived in was tiny. His parents always said we could use their land to build a house on, so we had got the planning permission, and about 4 years ago, the housing market had a real boom, and we managed to sell our house (it only took a day, and we had the pick of buyers) . Anyway, after we moved into our new, and much bigger house, hubby said 'maybe' instead of 'no' to my requests for another baby.
I took maybe as a yes, and a couple of months later i was pregnant. When he found out, he suggested an abortion, as the baby was due in May, and we had always planned for them to be older in school, which means in N.Ireland having a birthday after July. He hadn't thought I would get pregnant so quick, as I was 35 a week after the postitive result. No way could I abort my 4 th baby. just to avoid having one of the younger ones in the school year.
He only suggested it once, and when I said no, he never said it again.
Jack was born 2 weeks overdue, a very healthy baby, and he's now 19 months old. Yes I would like more,but with 2 healthy girls and 2 healthy boys, and i'm 37 now, I am happy to stop. If he said he'd like more, then I would, but I know he won't.
12/01/2011 at 10:58
Started to reply last night but was too tired.
Why is something we don't know.We're human beings,we follow our instincts there isn't always a why.Can't say why we have 7 and are are now having 8.All I know is that I wanted number 8 from the time Merlin was a few months old and it seemed to take forever this time to get pregnant but I'm very happy I am.When Merlin was born I was sure no more.It didn't take me long to change my mind.
Going from four to five you are definately a large family.The world and his wife will not only have an opinion on that but feel the right to voice that opinion,to you.Those people and their opinions are irrelevant,this is your life and it's up to you.
Space can be a problem.Most modern houses built today are not built for large families.Room size are in some cases ridiculously small.We always had space problems till we moved to our current house.The Victorians had a better idea how to build houses.Children don't need their own room.I have four girls sharing a large room.We'll soon have two sets of bunks in there,that's on the to do list.Two boys in an average room,we're putting a set of bunks in there too,that's an obvious space saver.One boy on his own,he has special needs,he can't share.Baby will go in either room.This is very strange idea we have these days,since when do children need their own room.
We struggle with getting enough chairs round the table,that's a minor thing.It took us w while to get that right,but if we have company we have to do two sittings.
Car size was a problem.People carriers claim to have room for 7.Five kids in car seats,a buggy in the boot,and where are you supposed to put your shopping.So you shop without your kids if possible,but you can still get caught out trying to get a weeks' shoping in one trolley.We shop online now,so much easier with little ones anyway.If you go out as a family though you are looking at something big,or two cars.We havea minibus.It's not pretty but it does what it says on the can.We still had to remove seats for boot space,as you could with a bigger people carrier.The bigger people carriers,the 8 and 9 seaters are very expensive,as is insurance.
Holidays have been a problem.Finding affordable accomodation,that will take our size family.You often find your looking at places that charge a price you'd pay for two families.Our choices are limited to camping now,but we can't go this year becuase we need a bigger minibus.
We have the largest domestic washing machine on the market,four laundry baskets and they're usually full .I might be sat on my bum at my pc but there's a mythical to do list that never ends.Our sofa has a gaping hole in it,which wasn't there when it was given to us by it's previous owners a few months ago.Our previous sofa went the same way,that had three previous owners.We'll buy new when this stuff stops happening,till then we fix it.
That looks like a lists of complaints,but it's not.Those are minor hurdles we deal with because we made a choice to become a larger family.They're all things that are not important to us.The happiness,fun and laughter,even the sheer noise level in our house an more importantly the very special relationships the kids have with each other are priceless.They are happy,fe ,clothed and warm,they want for nothing,in fact they have more than most.But I'm biased.This is my life.
I was very suprised to hear this off the sonographer just before Christmas.She said we had riches she could only dream of.She then went on to say that she regarded children as the true riches of this world and her greatest regret in life was that she didn't have any,even though she had a career she loved.
Sorry for the essay.
12/01/2011 at 15:25
Oh buster,try not to stress over it hun x
Jo has explained how she fits them in,my pal with nine has bunks everywhere,she no longer has a car,cant afford the insurance. She still goes out with them though,buses and trains are equally as handy.
I cant tell big fella why I'd like 4 I just would......but will I then want 5??? Probably!
20/01/2011 at 15:35
28/01/2011 at 16:33
I am now pregnant with number six, like your husband, mine wanted to know and I couldn't really answer him, I was talking to a midwife up at school before I fell pregnant and she said that it is like an itch and it will not go away if you have the urge to have another child and feel your family is not complete. I always knew that I wanted a big family, and when my husband and I met, he knew my feelings and at the time said he also wanted a big family, although I think he would have happily stopped at three! At the moment we have three girls and two boys, but I have decided not to find out the sex this time as it will be my final baby. I guess the only advice I can give is to sit down and explain to him how you feel. My children share bedrooms and possessions, we don't have extravagant holidays, but they certainly never go without and are extremely sociable children. We have just bought a Ford Tourneo, which has nine full seats and lots of boot space. I love my large family and would not change it for the world, I occasionally get asked by mums of one, when do you get time for yourself, and I guess the answer is very little time, but there will be plenty of time for that when they all grow up, I have just completed an Open University degree whilst being at home looking after the children, so it's not like you can't do anything. I have also just been informed by the primary school headteacher that I will have clocked up 20 years of non stop service there, by the time this one finishes...
29/01/2011 at 10:35
29/01/2011 at 10:42
17/02/2011 at 16:47
I should probably point out that I am one of 6 and my husband is one of two, so to me 5 would be normal but to him it's a crowd. I love having lots of siblings and want my kids to have the feeling of being in a gang too!
I know 4 is still a lot to some but it's not quite enough for me..
18/02/2011 at 21:38
I understand. Maybe he'll still come around. Must be lovely to be part of a large family. I envy you,there was just me and my bro-we hated each other,we actually live very close to one another now,and get on just fine but wasnt always the way,could have done with an ally!!!
I'm still undecided,my heart says have another to make 4,my head says stick with the 3,but we'll see......
I hope you can both come to a joint decision x
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