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03/03/2013 at 18:53
I've been with MrBoB for 13 years now. He snores. He has tried everything to stop it, including seeing doctors, specialists etc. but can't as the cause is chronic sinusitis (or summink). Before F, I used to use ear-plugs to sleep better. Since F (now 4) I've just put up with broken sleep, moving to the other room in the middle of the night, kicking him etc. in order to be able to hear our daughter if she needs me.
MrBoB hurt his back badly this week so I've been sleeping in the spare room so he can have full use of our bed and stay comfortable. I've been sleeping like a log and feel like a different woman.
So, what do I do? Stay in the spare room and sleep brilliantly but loose the marital closeness of sharing a bed or go back to the way things were with the broken sleep?
Answers on a postcard....
03/03/2013 at 19:24
Easy for me. My H and I sleep seperately. His snoring is awful. It seemed worse when I was pg, so i'd sleep on the sofa, even when I was full term.
We share the bed a couple of nights a week, but i'm always glad when I have it to myself for a full nights sleep.
My Dad and his wife sleep in separate bedrooms and have done I assume for the entiriy of their marriage and they are still together after 30 years so it obviously works for some people.
03/03/2013 at 21:06
We go to bed together, but if he falls asleep before me then his snoring bothers me and so I go to spare room. If I get asleep before him, and don't wake, then I'll stay there.
03/03/2013 at 22:22
Ha Ha. I can't say anything since my H insists it's me that snores (though not everynight). He usually just kicks me but TBH I don't even notice.
Could you use the spare room a few night a week and share the bed the rest of the time?
04/03/2013 at 04:30
It works for some but for us I may as well ordered the divorce papers as I order spare bedding. H snores awfully and until ella arrived 8 weeks ago I too wore earplugs. Listening to H snore has benefited the biggest cause of my newborn tiredness but I could never not sleep with him; especially on a long term basis.
04/03/2013 at 06:55
My H snores as well. I don't think he realises how much it impacts my sleep. He starts before he's even asleep so unless I get in there first and crash before he does I lay awake for ages nudging him and sshhing him.
04/03/2013 at 08:02
Thanks all. I appreciate some perspective in this and it seems perfectly normal for happily married couples to sleep separately some or all of the time. I wish it didn't take me so long to drop off (an hour or more some nights) as he's normally asleep (and snoring) before his head hits the pillow!
Well last night MrBoB was feeling a bit better so we slept in the same bed until about 1am when his snoring woke me up. I decided not to faff about trying and struggling to get back to sleep before he started again and moved to the spare room where I slept like a log until 6am (my normal wake up time).
I think I shall try and at least start the night in with him but not be so reluctant to move in future.
04/03/2013 at 08:15
My H is a snorer too. It drives me crazy sometimes. He's being checked out for sinus problems though, has your H seen a doctor?
We found that a heat pad applied at the start of the night helped sometimes, something like one of these: wheatybags.co.uk/.../eye-forehead
04/03/2013 at 09:31
We have been together for nearly 14 years and he has always snored badly, I wear earplugs, I still hear both the girls if they wake up but can zone out the snoring, somehow it just works. OH had an operation on his nose last year as he had blocked sinuses but it has not made a huge inprovement.
05/03/2013 at 21:04
We always start off in the same bed but rarely end up in the same one! When people come to stay I dread not having an escape possible as there are then no spare beds.
When he is on nights I totally enjoy having the bed and silence to myself but I do love snuggling up with him too.
05/03/2013 at 21:47
My H is a horrendous snorer sometimes and it can be difficult for me to get to sleep. I'm a heavy sleeper, once I am asleep, so I don't hear him. He has gotten better in recent years but I don't know if that's to do with a change in the mattress/pillows (better sleeping position for him?) as nothing else has changed. If I couldn't sleep properly because of his snoring, then I would go to the spare room as my crankiness wouldn't be worth it. X
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