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08/01/2013 at 09:38
I really really need to sort this out. Neither H nor I have one. It's something we just tend to forget about so I determined to get it sorted this month.
How much does it cost to do a will? Will any old solicitor on the high street do it?What needs to be covered, what's involved? Will ours be difficult because of H's kids?
08/01/2013 at 09:44
I went about starting to get one, but he just drafted me a standard one and I wanted it slightly different because of H's son. I forgot to go back to him. I think that it was £50, but that was when we were buying our house, so it might have been a deal. What it basically said was, everything to go to each other and on our deaths go to L and N. I wanted to change it so that L would get 3/4 and N would get 1/4 because N would have all his mums
08/01/2013 at 09:45
Nope we haven't, we are like you and keep putting it off but you've reminded me again. We have no excuse as h gets a free one with work. Will remind him about it today.
I also had in that if anything happened to L that my sister and her H would be responsible for him along with our parents
08/01/2013 at 09:49
Yeah see I don't want G getting much of ours, and should K and L have equals because she *might* get something from her mum?
08/01/2013 at 09:53
I know, its complicated for you. You class K as your daughter whereas N is def not my son. I don't know, what does D say? Could you maybe have your 1/2 divided by 2 and D have his divided by 3? xx
08/01/2013 at 09:59
We've been meaning to get one done since we had C but never got round to it - we really should do something about it and ours would be pretty simple!
08/01/2013 at 10:00
We've never spoken about it tbh. He just does not want the ex to get her hands on anything. I do class K as my daughter but equally why should L get less if she wil get from her mum iyswim?
08/01/2013 at 10:02
Yep, that is the same as me. Could you maybe specify that Lou gets something like 1/2 and the other 2 get 1/4 each?
08/01/2013 at 10:03
No, and i know it's something we need to get done. My parents don't have one either. I think i must come from a family of people who would like to stick their heads in the sand about this kind of stuff.
08/01/2013 at 10:04
But then that's not fair on K getting the same as G Gawd it's hard. I need to talk to H about it.
08/01/2013 at 10:06
God, I don't know, it is really hard. Who would you want to look after L?
08/01/2013 at 10:10
Nina. We've already discussed it. My parents are useless, my sister doesn't give a monkey's about me or my family - she's in her own ittle bubble all the time - and my brother is stoopid.
08/01/2013 at 10:22
No, we still haven't sorted ours out, this is a good reminder!
08/01/2013 at 10:25
No and we need to do it! mainly due to the care of Lauren if anything happens to Rob and not me - I want to ensure she is provided for and also the duty of care goes to Lauren's choice not her mother (unless she wants!)
With regards to what they get, L and M get the same, I couldn't have it any other way. L is due to get some of her grandads money from her Mum's Dad (£25k) when she is 18/21but to be honest I just see this as what she is entitled to and I have not worried about what she may get on top of that a) because she deserves whatever they give her (as you know we have never had a penny of support) and b) because the likelihood is she will get nothing from them!
the situation for you is harder because of G. The option you do have is to leave all the money in trust to someone you trust and see that they determine at the point of your death how you would like the money divided between specified people (i.e. the 3 children) at this point, whoever is executor would know if you had contact with all three children or not and what your wishes would be with regards to money.
The other thing that I have also considered is due to the age difference with the girls, we may have paid for Lauren's education and something could happen before Molly reaches the age of education and could struggle financially whilst her sister is off so I plan to leave an allowance for education the same as we spend on Lauren which will be down to the executor to determine when she gets it
08/01/2013 at 10:31
Thats fab about Nina looking after Lou, aren't internet weirdies great?
08/01/2013 at 10:46
We have one. We did it about 3 year ago. The most important part of it for me was deciding who would have the kids if H and I died. We have a big family and whilst they would all be happy to I wouldn't want my parents or IL's burdened with the kids so one of my sisters agreed.
I also stipulated that if all of us died the money was to be split 4 ways between my sisters and BIL and I excluded specificially a half brother I have as I don't really know him.
08/01/2013 at 10:47
I have came back to this again. I thinkt aht you have to talk to D about it. Do you personally want K to get anything from you?
08/01/2013 at 10:53
Yes, I did one last year for the kids benefit. I wanted some say in who would take them should the worst happen, as well as what happens to the money rather than it all going to probate - I'll be minted when I'm gone! I did an additional letter for E stipulating my wishes for her too.
08/01/2013 at 10:54
Nina it sounds like you're sorted and youjust need to get it down on paper. Reading part of that makes me sound harsh though for not wanting K to get as much as L. Your L has been with you since very early on, K has only been with us in recent years.
Fi, of course I do, I see her as my own but I don't want L to struggle and K be better off cos they've had 50/50 plus she gets another 50 off her mum iyswim?
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