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07/12/2013 at 19:16
There are so many things he always did that didn't bother me but really bother me now after what his teacher said.
The face pulling when you are talking to him. The noises. The repipition.
It just digs at me every time he does these things now and I have no-one to share my worries with.
08/12/2013 at 11:50
Aw QI, I've no experience, but wanted to offer a big hug. Always welcome to share here x
08/12/2013 at 12:22
I'm sorry you have this worry QI. Do you ask him to stop? Or does he not notice he's doing it?
08/12/2013 at 13:46
I'm the same with N ever since the word 'autistic' started being thrown around. I'm quite accepting if people's eccentricities anyway but now I'm conscious that the general public might not be and so without altering his personality I do want him to fit in and not be seen as too weird when he's older. For me it's mainly the repetitive questions that have to stop so once he's asked something if he asks again I tell him that I've answered already and he knows the answer. And then the face pulling in random situations, well I try to ask him to stop but it's his way of dealing with whatever that situation is so if for example, he's lost track of a conversation and he starts acting the fool to make people laugh I will remind him that someone has asked him a question or suggest a question he can ask.
I'm meeting with his psychologist and teachers tomorrow and the question about how much is normal child's behaviour and how much is the asd is the exact question I will be asking!
08/12/2013 at 16:35
LB it is good to have access to someone else.
I have been thinking about how I have been able to support him so much better until recently. He was a really good sleeper and now I think of how I made things easier for him to sleep, I found the right 'scaffolding' for him and I jsut need to try and do that everywhere. Last night I remembered I have to keep everything in short sentences, simple instructions and then he is so helpful. I need to remember your tip about the repeated questions. On the face pulling I am trying to praise 'good' faces. Oh god and what about the pica? Originally I thought that was to do with his coeliac but now... he has eaten his favourite top.
08/12/2013 at 17:47
I remember the psych saying that if he gets stuck talking about one thing or repeated questions just change the subject. Say 'we've talked about that, now what did you do at school today or do you remember when we did xyz? You're right about the scaffolding, good way of putting it :-) I also have to keep things short and simple with instructions, discipline etc. it's hard enough to get his attention sometimes without banging on and on about something while he's totally lost interest ha.
08/12/2013 at 18:07
Pica is inappropriate of eating, with B it used to always be bits of metal but currently he seems to be eating his clothes. Bedore that he jsut ate constantly. I read somewhere to get their attention use an unsual noise rather than their name - it hasn't worked here!
08/12/2013 at 19:58
Remember as well that its easy to focus on the things that seem 'wrong' and forget about the many things that they do right. My nephew - who is high functioning autistic - has many strategies to help him with the bits that he struggles with such as noise, social situations, etc. It took his parents a while to recognise that as well as the autism, he is also academically very intelligent and so also needs to be encouraged to keep this going too. I know B hasn't been diagnosed with anything and it is all speculation but either way he is still B.
08/12/2013 at 20:05
Cheers Cedar He is still the exceptionally helpful little boy that takes everything literally. Like tonight I said if he wanted to take his Christmas cards in to school tomorrow then he needed to finish them tonight and to do that he needed to stop wandering off and just sit there until he finished them. Well whilst doing them he weed himself. He explained that I had said to stay there until he had finished them. I think I would have exploded at him before for that but tonight I explained that we must wee on the toilet. There are so many things like that happen on a daily basis which I had taken to him being a PITA or a cheeky tw*t but now think how did I phrase it?
09/12/2013 at 08:00
Yes its hard to focus on saying things in a simple manner. And of course its annoying for you when he does things like that because you feel he should be beyond it.
Are the school just monitoring at this stage?
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