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25/02/2013 at 21:02
But the person is still alive.
it all seems a bit strange to be honest.
The lady is a friend from my Hs side and has terminal cancer.
I feel sad going? I couldn't imagine sitting at my own wake, looking round and my friends and family laughing and knowing it would be the last time I ever saw them together.
25/02/2013 at 21:03
I suppose you could say its a farewell party. She doesn't want a wake after her funeral.
25/02/2013 at 21:04
It's such a hard one. I can imagine their want to see everyone again but I couldn't imagine getting over it being a sad occasion which I'm sure isn't what they want.
26/02/2013 at 09:45
Yes, it's going to be such a strange atmosphere!
26/02/2013 at 09:52
I'd try to see it more as a final big get together. I know that's sad but I've had similar in the past. My cousin was 23 when he died of CJD and whilst he wasn't told what he had (he was too ill to units and by the time we got a diagnosis) he knew he was very sick. Once we all did a massive day out to the seaside, including family we only saw at times like Christmas. We all took the day off work/school and mucked about like kids. It poured with rain which made it all the more funny. It was like a big good bye but we got to spend it together.
26/02/2013 at 10:15
Mil did this. It was lovely tbh. It was NEVER called a wake and there was no mention of illness but it was her 'per Christmas get together' they did used to have an Xmas party at home the sat before Xmas every year but it was just reall extended family and neighbours. This time they hired a pub, full buffet, free bar, all their army friends from all over uk and Cyprus came, some of her old friends from where she grew up, all her old workmates. There was a disco etc. was really nice and people got to see mil looking as well as she could. Mil knew it was a wake but obviously it was never reffered to as that but mil was so chuffed to see her old workmates and old school mates. It was good for FIL too to see all the old army pals.
Its Mils funeral on Thursday and there is a wake after it but fils really happy that mil got to see everyone before she died
26/02/2013 at 10:39
i think its a really nice idea.
26/02/2013 at 10:43
My mums friend organised one of these but very sadly died the day before. It still went ahead and turned into more of a life celebration- everyone was having fun, not wearing black, lots of alcohol and memories of happy times. I think the idea is lovely, I'd do the same if I knew my time was running out as it's a great way to have all the people you love and care for together one last time. I hope you can enjoy it Dolly x
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