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14/06/2013 at 12:11
Can you believe it?! Think we've done it about 3 times since beginning of May. I'm just not in the mood for it and when we do I'm just wanting it over.
14/06/2013 at 12:18
You don't seem yourself in lots of ways lately. Are you ok? x
14/06/2013 at 12:21
I agree with Kellfi. Is there something underlying that's getting you down?
14/06/2013 at 12:38
Really? Do I not?
14/06/2013 at 12:41
Is it not just because you are shattered, you get up at stupid o'clock, work all day, don't get in til stupid o'clock, then need to sort the kids etc, its no wonder your not that interested.
14/06/2013 at 12:42
Oh my god belle, so have I ! I feel exactly the same, want it to be over. I feel terrible on H because he's noticed but its not actually him it's just I don't want it for some reason. I was going to blame my pill?
14/06/2013 at 12:44
Same here, and H seems to have too. Getting some sleep is more important to us at the moment, even on holiday when H is usually wanting it all the time he wasn't. I guess it's the kids as well, they're a bit of a put off when there is a risk of being interrupted.
14/06/2013 at 12:53
I'm the same, completely lost it. Although it kind of went missing about a year ago when I fell pregnant and it's not fully returned yet. H has noticed although he's just as tired as me so he has some understanding. I just find there is always something to do or think about and when we get into bed I'm tired. I feel bad but what can ya do??
14/06/2013 at 13:07
I think so Belle, maybe its just the new job, being ill, dieting, the crap with your family love
14/06/2013 at 13:09
SW that's more than likely it, by the time we get to bed we just crash. Although we did go out for dinner, just the 2 of us on Sunday and we had nothing to talk about. We practically sat in silence, it was really bad.
14/06/2013 at 13:27
That doesn't sound like you but you have got a new job, extra person living with you and working longer hours, and all relationships go through dry spells.
Do you ever have fun together, with or without other people around. We find we need time away from the home to enjoy time together wether thats with friends family or not.
Has your H lost his mojo too?
14/06/2013 at 13:30
My sister's been gone for about 2 months hon. H never loses his mojo, he has given up trying though. Maybe that's why I'm now more conscious of it? We get the odd bit of time together but really it's us and kids. Like I said we went out for a meal last Sunday and he hardly spoke a word to me. I was trying he was answering. I do feel like we need to refind us. We don't have a laugh or anything anymore.
14/06/2013 at 13:32
maybe its because of your job move, like you are plumbing absolutely everything into your job and you are enjoying it so thats been your focus iyswim. then you are working long hours too.
14/06/2013 at 13:35
You have had a lot happening in your life recently. Me and H are going through a dry spell too, we're both just so tired although I realise that's just an excuse but I'm one of those that as soon as my head hits the pillow I fall asleep.
14/06/2013 at 13:36
I would be the same if I worked all the hours you did and I bet it doesn't help that you now have 2 teenagers in the house. Sex can't really be spontanious, it has to be planned, its bad enough in my house with a 9yr old who doesn't go to sleep til after 9pm.
You probably didn't have anything to talk about because it would all of been about work, he works all of the time, you work all of the time and there's only so much you can say about the kids and no one really wants her hear much about other people's work.
14/06/2013 at 13:37
Sorry I meant his other daughter living with you.
I'm guessing you still love him and fancy him? If so then its a case of having fun together and then it all sort of slots back into place. Me and H have been the same recently relationship wise, but I think thats the financial strain.
14/06/2013 at 14:00
You sound like you've lost the spark between you both? Maybe it needs more than just a meal out, try and make yourself a bit more attentive (is that the right word?) try an be more touchy feely, flirty. Randomly go in for a cuddle and take it back to basics.
I get annoyed with being expected to switch on a sex button when I get in bed, if I've not had even a cuddle or a lovey dovey evening I find it hard to have sex.
14/06/2013 at 14:15
Defo lost the spark. I've never fancied my husband but I fell in love with him iyswim? Lot's of people find that weird but it's just the way it was. I'm going to sound awful now but where I've lost weight I feel he needs to sort himself out a bit too, you've all probably noticed the questions about clothes for him and stuff. He is trying, he's cut right back on the booze but he needs a complete overhaul and maybe I'm more aware of that and I'm putting too much emphasis on that. We need some fun times too. Actually what we both need is a proper naughty night, that will get the spark back for us!
14/06/2013 at 14:19
I remember you saying that before. Its not weird. you must fancy him to want to have sex with him though, no?
I know what you mean and I think you are in the same position as many. Hope that makes sense of some sorts.
I have been trying to get H to funk himself up a bit as he is approaching 40 and needs a bit more help in that department! lol
14/06/2013 at 14:20
That doesn't sound awful at all. I think before you lost the weight etc you were stuck in a rut of eating whatever, boozing all the time and that was just the way it was. Now you've sorted yourself out as you put it, got yourself a new job etc you realise there's more to life than that.
Your H sounds like a proper mans man, doesn't get clothes, sticks with what he's comfortable in (which there's nowt wrong with) doesn't think men need to look after themselves. My H was a bit like this until last Christmas when I bougth him 'toiletries/creams', now he couldn't live without them, uses face creams, hand creams, face washes etc.
He sounds like he's getting in to exercise a bit, is that right? Do you find him attractive to look at or are you a bit put off by his body?
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