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09/12/2013 at 08:02
We ended up having H's kids, and J was ill, so didn't want to stay at my Mums.
With being ill myself, I was really looking forward to a weekend of rest, no such luck. J napped a lot though, so wasn't TOO bad.
Has an issue (as always) with my SS, he smashed the screen of his DS (his 5th - at least, this year), BUT, it's OK, because he has another one at home . Their Mum bought them another one each, because last week, SS left his DS at our house, and she didn't want them to be without a DS at home. WTVF???
J seems to be better, thankfully. C came down with D&V last night, so he is off school, and my ear has become blocked, just as I seemed to be getting better. Hope it all disappears for Christmas.
H was all blocked up, so his snoring was 100 x worse than normal, I literally had to fight the urge to smother him. SO tired, but thankfully, he's away for at least a couple of days this week, for work.
Is it bedtime yet??
09/12/2013 at 08:28
Hope you're feeling better soon AK and the sickness bugs go away from the whole family.
Your H's ex is living in some kind of strange universe. Those poor children, what a sense of entitlement they're growing up with. Unbelievable!
09/12/2013 at 08:41
The actual words out of SS's mouth were "it's OK, I have another at home". I swear, all the CSA money must be going on buying DS's.
If one of my boys smashed the screen ON PURPOSE, i'd be damned if I was going to replace it. If it was an accident, maybe, but he does it on purpose...
Whatever they do (I say they, but 9 times out of 10, it is my SS), their Mum glosses over it, or puts words into their mouth, to excuse their behaviour. Poor things don't stand a chance in the real world...
We found out my SS has been seeing a psychiatrist... Much needed IMO, there's definitely something "not right" with him. But, I think most of that is down to his mother, and she should see someone too.
09/12/2013 at 13:01
omg he does it on purpose? How/why? If my kids did that they would go without. Sorry its been a house of ills x
09/12/2013 at 14:40
Not sure why he does it TBH. H has a look round their room before he takes them home, to see what SS has wrecked, and this weekend, he found some of SD's DVDs, he's wrecked. (cut, scratched etc)
For years, H said, "oh, he's only 3/4/5", wound me up no end. But he's 6 now, he is more than old enough to know better. I don't go for the "they're only xyz yrs old" thing at all. That to me, is making excuses for their behaviour, rather than addressing it directly.
His Mum just shrugs it off, she's useless (for a woman with 5 kids, she has zero idea of how to be a parent), so we have given up even talking to her about it. Plus, if we call her when we have the kids, she moans at us, for interrupting her weekend...
09/12/2013 at 19:56
My E is 6 and March and knows not to do that sort of thing, he wouldn't even think of it, its a bit strange isn't it?
09/12/2013 at 21:39
Probably because there are no consequences he keeps pushing or in this case smashing. Children like to know where the boundaries are but for him it just means they're replaced so there are fewer boundaries.
Must make it so hard for you AK. A friend who has a stepson described it as she's on planet earth, the dad is on mars and the mum is on jupiter all pulling in different ways with a sulky teenager to contend with.
10/12/2013 at 08:09
We thought at first that it was attention seeking, with J coming along, as he was blaming J for a lot of the things he was doing wrong (weeing in his bedroom, breaking toys, stealing etc), but when he started doing stuff at home and school, we decided it couldn't be J, and maybe just an over all attention seeking thing.
His Mum doesn't do anything with him, he is either left with his Nan so she can go out, or parked infront of the TV. We try and do stuff when they're here, but they have no idea about social interaction, and just sit, staring at people, who are trying to talk to them. It's embarrassing TBH, especially when people think they are my kids I feel awful for that, but even J, at 2 yrs old, is chatty, and polite, has beautiful manners - he puts my step kids to shame.
When we take them home, and tell his Mum what SS has done, in the hope she'll help get to the route of the problem, she just cuddles him, and says "oohhh, you had a nasty time with Daddy and AK?" Yeah, helpful... She just doesn't discipline him AT ALL, because "he is only 6"
It has got to the point, where I really don't enjoy having my SS here. My SD is fine (mostly), and I'd have her no problem, but I feel stuck with my SS. There's only so much we can do in the 2 days we have him, which then gets undone, the minute he gets home.
I had a crappy relationship with my step mum, and wanted it to be so different with my step kids, but SS has made it impossible for me to love him
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