General Chat, Products & Comps <
24/06/2013 at 12:55
I was in a shop with M earlier, was looking at stuff and M says mummy what's that lady doing? I glanced up and saw an extremely large woman walking down the aisle, so I said,sshe's just walking and turned back to what I was looking at. "What, like this mummy?" I turned round and M was doing her penguin waddle down the aisle the guy next to me was in stitches! That's the first time she's ever done anything like that....
So ladies, share yours, make me feel better!
24/06/2013 at 12:59
Lucas the other day to gbf 'do you do stand up wees?.... My mummy sits down'
Lucas to the woman who ran his little Pre school when he was 2years 9 months 'my daddy says f**k'
24/06/2013 at 13:02
Laughing out loud!
Once I was waiting with A at the dentists. There were two chairs but not next to each other. I said to her 'you sit there, I'll sit over here'
'No I don't want to sit next to that ugly fat woman'
24/06/2013 at 13:27
There was one time I was having dinner with ex, his parents and his nephew and his nephew piped up that his mummy and daddy were playing hide and seek in bed that morning and daddy was hiding and they wouldn't let him play. Ex's dad walked away from the table disgusted and ex was kicking me for laughing
24/06/2013 at 13:30
Ha ha ha!
S did similar to H once. He suddenly shouts out 'daddy look at that fat man! Why is his belly so fat?!'
He also went through a phase where he thought every man with a beard was a pirate. So once on a bus he shouts 'look mummy, that man is a pirate!' About a man sat right in front of us
24/06/2013 at 13:38
G was asked by a lady in the shop once if she was having a nice day and G replied with her hand down the back of her trousers "i've just got an itchy bum".
G also thinks any man wearing a turban is a pirate and once we had a taxi driver wearing one and G says really loudly "look mummy there's a pirate driving"! Luckily he saw the funny side!
She also asked "what's wrong with that man's eyes" in the chinese the other week.
24/06/2013 at 13:40
C is dreadful for swearing at the moment. It's entirely my fault, I have a potty mouth.
We were in the changing room of a shop the other day, and someone slammed the door as they went out and he shouted "DON'T SLAM THAT BLOODY DOOR!".
I. could. have. died.
Instead I said how rooode he was, and laughed silently in the changing room until I was sure whoever it was had gone.
He comes out with all sorts of classic line at the moment: - "Sort your attitude out or you're on the step." was what he told his big sister last night.
Walking out of a shop at lakeside Molly shouts at the top of her voice "look theres grandad" at a man with white hair, so Rob said "no it's not Grandad he is at home" so she says " it is, he has white hair and a big fat belly just like my grandad" .......
There was also the times when she was justs learning to talk and we taught her two little dickie birds, she used to walk around sticking her fingers up shouting "***" waiting for us to sing the song
24/06/2013 at 13:41
24/06/2013 at 13:44
Ha sshh, M says things like that too - she said to me the other day "if you don't cut that out lady I'm not going to be happy with you"
CW I can't work out what's been starred out!
24/06/2013 at 13:47
When I was at a supermarket once there was an old lady with an unfortunately shaped nose, complete with a boil at the end of it. Big C started talking really loudly "Look, look at that woman. She's got a witches nose!" closely followed by "Hey lady, are you a real witch?"
I pretended he wasn't mine.
24/06/2013 at 13:48
When C was 3, he started singing "oompa lumpa" when a dwarf got on the bus.
This same woman got insulted by J a few weeks ago, when he stroked her arm and said "awww, baby" (he thinks eeryone who is small is a baby)
The other day in town, an old woman sat by us, who smelled very strongly of wee. J lept up, and said "eugh stinky. Yuck yuck" while pointing at this poor woman.
Sshh I LOVE that
Theses are fab. E is coming out with some corkers at the moment. Her current thing is eating her bogies. When i tell her not to she'll say "but they taste like strawberries" and make a yummy noise.
She has also pointed at quite a few men with beards and say that they're Santa.
24/06/2013 at 13:50
AK oops, same person twice is unfortunate!
24/06/2013 at 13:52
Ha ha its D * C K
Molly is a swearer too. We were at nursery waiting for her friend the other day and she shouts out " for F's sake Mummy, Phoebe has a new car" she also gives us ultimatums as in " it's a fudge or nothing, thats my deal" so I pick nothing and she gets annoyed with me!
24/06/2013 at 14:09
Oh I daren't list the things L repeats off his daddy.
24/06/2013 at 14:10
These are brilliant. I always remember taking a toddler for a ride once and she merrily told me how mummy doesn't live daddy anymore and he has to sleep on the sofa. Meanwhile her dad looked mortified!
28/06/2013 at 08:30
Liam is going through a phase at the moment of saying to people 'don't talk to Liam like that' or 'be quiet coz I am talking'. When asked last night to go to his Daddy for his dirty nappy changed - Liam's reply was 'not now Daddy, I'm too busy playing with my toys'. Liam is 26 months old. Liam also likes to tell people when Mummy and Daddy have gone for a wee.
Liam is also going through a phase of swearing and has been known to say ffs, f-off and has been heard saying you stupid g*t or you stupid tw*t.
28/06/2013 at 08:36
Last summer, J was running down our street and shouted "mam, isn't she really fat", the woman lived across the road and definately heard him.
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