General Chat, Products & Comps <
18/10/2013 at 11:32
Oh lovely! Are you ok? what happened? x
18/10/2013 at 11:34
Oh no, what's happened?
Sorry, the judge has decided to appoint a gardian and make us all have Phycological evaluations. Won't be back for a final hearing untill after Christmas. In the interin we have to force SD to see her mum for a full day once a month.
18/10/2013 at 11:38
Oh I'm so sorry it wasn't the outcome you were hoping for. I have no experience of this type of thing so can't offer any advice xxx
18/10/2013 at 11:44
Oh P I'm so sorry. I've no experience of Guardians - what does it mean?
18/10/2013 at 11:56
Who are they suggesting as guardians lovely?
Ok I know you are disapointed but look at it this way:
- all court reports are so far in your favour
- your SD is safe with you
- Access - is it to be supervised? I really don't like the whole "force" situation, you cannot force a child of this age to do anything
- Evaluatoins - I am assuming that this is being done to look at the balance of you all mentally? I would not see this as a threat from what you have told us, her mother is unhinged, your SD has been witness to this, you have been affected by it and witness to it. you provide a good stable home for your SD and are a normal family with a normal child. We did have this done - again I will talk to you offline if you want to discuss. On the plus side though if her Mum does have this done too it will come out exactly how she is and that could hinder her case rather than help it.
- I am sure you wouldn't but please do not lower yourself to her level, carry on as you have been dignified and concentrate on your family, let he Mum do what she wants
THinking of you all today x
18/10/2013 at 12:10
Wise words from CW x
18/10/2013 at 12:20
I'm so sorry that things didn't go to plan today. However, like CW said, don't be disheartened as there are lots of positives. The Courts need to ensure that they are being fair to all parties and where there is a litigant in person, they are extra cautious. The Judge will not want to be appealed and therefore will ensure that before making a final order, he/she has done all they can to ensure that their Judgment is water-tight.
The guardian appointed will represent your SD's wishes and is often a good person to have on your side when there are so many allegations flying back and forth. The focus on what your SD wants and needs will be conveyed to the Court by the guardian. As to the Phych reports, these again are fairly common where there are lots of allegations in a case as they will help the Judge asses how your SD's needs can be met and what the parties' intentions are. CW is right about what the reports could show in view of what you have said about your H's ex.
As to "forcing" your SD to see her mother, you will have to show that you have done all you can to encourage the contact but in my experience, if a child your SD's age point blank refuses to go, there is little that can be done. If this happens, I would speak to the guardian appointed and explain all you have done to encourage the contact to show that you are taking on board what the Judge has said etc.
Sorry for brief reply but am just catching a few mins whilst E naps and he is now stirring! Am on the FB group if you have any questions and want to private message me. Sounds like CW has been a good help for you already x
18/10/2013 at 14:49
Oh no, that's such a shame. Hope you are ok xx
18/10/2013 at 15:30
big hugs P xxx
18/10/2013 at 16:00
Hi all, thanks for all the well wishes,
CW - have emailed you
Ferbs - That's the impression that we got, that the judge didn't want any reason for it to be able to be brought back to court/appealed. I will try and find you over FB, thanks for the offer.
Thanks again for the support.
18/10/2013 at 19:36
I'm sorry it didn't go as you hoped but here's hoping for a positive outcome when it finally comes round! x
18/10/2013 at 20:32
So sorry that you didn't get the outcome you wanted today xx
18/10/2013 at 20:36
Gosh - not what I was expecting to read Glad CW and Ferbs are here for you
19/10/2013 at 21:13
It was totally not what any of us were expecting. The SW thinks the judge's idea on contact is really wrong and couldn't believe it. We're back in court in roughly 2 weeks time, so there's a chance the judge might order against the Psych family assesment and wrap it up there and then.
Ferbs- im not in the FB group. My initials are BMB (H) could you message me please if thats still ok?
20/10/2013 at 08:43
P, probably best to give me your email address and I will message you as don't think I will be able to find you on fb jut from your initials. Once I have seen your email I will let you know so that you can delete x
20/10/2013 at 16:23
Yeah thats probably a good idea deleted x
20/10/2013 at 18:21
Got it, will email you my address now
20/10/2013 at 19:13
Thank you, I've emailed you x
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