General Chat, Products & Comps <
19/03/2014 at 09:41
I feel petty and horrible. It looks like my SIL has regifted the clinique gift set we gave her for Christmas back to me for my birthday. I hasten to add it wasn't a random gift we gave her it was on her amazon gift list. I kind of feel like saying thank yo for the books and clinique gift set. Did you like your clinique gift set we gave you at Christmas so much that you decided to give me the same one. Or more bluntly you realise you have given me the same clinique gift set as we gave you for Christmas, obviously it looks like you have regifted it back to me. If I had opened the bag of makeup inside I would give it back to her for her birthday. If I am being kind, I strongly suspect it is the gift we gave her for Christmas but she forgot and didn't have time to get me something so quickly grabbed something she thought would make a nice present. This is compounded by her managing to give two of the same lego sets to my son for this Christmas yes two identical lego sets, same packaging. She also previous birthday gave me back a tea light in a holder which we had given as a wedding favour to all the ladies at our wedding five years previously.
I know she is jealous of us but really she has no need to be. I am certain she wouldn't really want to walk a mile in our shoes. Her brother my husband was very ill last summer, she basically pretty much said I was lying and was no help and support. I was also told I was worrying her and my husband parents and shouldn't say that my husband her brother might need a heart transplant.
Sorry for ranting
19/03/2014 at 10:14
She sounds 'orrible! I know I wouldn't be ballsy enough for direct conflict, but I think I would acknowledge the set is the same one. In a hideous passive-aggressive fashion probably... 'Ooh the same as your one - did you love it? Which product would you most recommend...?'.
19/03/2014 at 10:50
She does sound horrible but rise above it. I love Clinique stuff - so just enjoy using it yourself.
She's the kind of relative that you just have to laugh about - in a 'remember when she did that' type way. (The present giving, not the insensitive selfishness about illness part). Because she will always be a part of your family and its best to not waste your energies in life in worrying about what she thinks. I would just accept that she is a rubbish present giver and leave it at that.
19/03/2014 at 10:51
Thank you, I feel better just for getting it off my chest. I don't like conflict either so I will probably go down the passive aggressive route at least she is then aware hopefully that we know what she did. She can be really difficult but I don't think she realises the way she comes across.
19/03/2014 at 10:53
Could she possibly have liked it so much when she received hers that she just had to rush out and buy you one so you could share her joy?
Otherwise I think she sounds a bit awful, I very rarely re-gift and if I do I am extra careful about not making this kind of mistake.
I'd be tempted to do what Counter said and ask which product she found the best.
19/03/2014 at 10:55
Thank you Cedar, currently I only have anything to do with her because she is part of my husband's family and because our son loves her boys. We get on well with her husband and even her husbands parents who she doesn't get on with. I am certain most of the time she doesn't realise how she comes across. I would love to be able to explain how certain things make me feel because I think sometimes it is because she doesn't understand me. We just are very different.
19/03/2014 at 10:59
Thanks nftfi, I don't think she would have gone out and got me one, I would hope it was ahhh I haven't got my SIL enough ( I would have been perfectly happy with the other part of the present the Hunger Games box set) maybe even the present I ordered hasn't arrived what can I give her. Oh thats a nice gift set I haven't opened I can give her that but forgot we gave it to her for Christmas
19/03/2014 at 11:10
I can think of worse things to be regifted - but it sucks all the same if that's what she's done. I am guessing that the fact she's possibly been ungrateful for the present you bought her at Christmas has been made worse by what she said about your H last year.
Separate the two things - she is clearly being very mean about your H and potentially has no idea of the problems he was facing (I hope he's better now?). The present thing is petty, I would be annoyed if I'd spent time and money gifting someone an item that they wanted, only to have it returned to me. But as the others have said, maybe she liked it so much that she got you the same thing? Does she make a habit of regifting?
19/03/2014 at 11:21
Sshh, at least it is something nice and yes I can make use of it. You are right I need to separate the two issues. My H's health is stable at the moment which we are very thankful for he has to take medication and we are hopefully getting a second opinion on the heart transplant front. Very unusually the centre where he had his transplant assesment and said they weren't going to take things further are in full support of us getting a second opinion. His heart is bad enough to need a transplant but they have never done a heart transplant on a person at this centre with his condition. This does not however mean that it can't be done successful. We are very fortunate that my H has been able to go back to work and do other things that he enjoys. I would never dream of stopping him doing the things that he loves and don't believe in wrapping him up in cotton wool. Being able to do the things he loves is one of the things that keep him going. Also we have been told by the cardiologist and others we have a very positive outlook and are doing really well.
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