i cant get my 9 mounth old to sleep all throug the night

hi i have a son hu is 9 mounth old (jay) and i have takin him of the breast 4 a wile now he has 3 meals  a day and he still wakes up in the middle of thenight and he doesnt take water he doesnt have his dummy e has a bottle sometimes he just wnts a cuddle wid his dummy i am 16 leavin school soon and i am doing exams soon i need sleep and so does jay im just worried that he should be sleeping through the night because he had 3 meals a day and snaks between them could you give me ant advise at all anything will do i dont complain a dont get much sleep i love being a mum i am jst concernd about jay 

 thanks

 xxxxxxx

You sound like you have tried all the right things.  Have you given Jay a toy for comfort?  I'm currently trying to wean my daughter off her dummy by giving her the toy as a substitute. I have only been doing this for 4 nights but she loves having her bear in bed with her.  She is waking up less now.  May work?

Good luck.

thanks for the help i will try do my best with things

thank you

xxx

Hi, i also have a son william he is 4 months old and i have just got him to go from 7.30pm to 6.30am.

It was very hard and time consuming but it only took 3 days. I tried controlled crying recommended by my health visitor as i know he doesnt need to feed at night. I know some people dont believe in it but it worked for me.

We do 10 mins of allowing him to cry then i go in no eye contact and put his dummy in and shhh him and pat his back for 2 mins. If he persists to cry i leave and allow him another 10 mins max and do the same again. If after this turn he still cries i pick him up calm him down in my arms in his room in the dark and then put him back before he falls asleep. You can repeat this process again but if they still dont settle make sure you have checked other reasons why they might cry.

My partner was amazing support during this time as it is so hard hearing them cry for you but now william is a happy content baby who gets enough sleep and i get enough to function through the day too.

I hope this helps x

i will try it god it going to be hard

thanks

xxx

Please do not! I know you may be desperate for your little one to sleep but theres plenty of evidence that crying it out causes damage to children. he is only little, he has years ahead of him yet, sleep is just one thing, theres so much more to life.

if your gut instinct tells you not to do CIO then do not do it. babies who stop crying because they have been left are not necessarily contented, they have often just 'given up'.

If you are feeling tired maybe try getting a rest in the day or think about having him with a childminder or nursery a day a week.

good luck with your exams.

My eldest girls slept through from 4 months even though they were breastfed, my youngest has been on the formula for 7 weeks and is now 8mths old, she still wakes through the night, I can't do controlled crying, it disturbs her sisters too much and as my husband works shifts he is regularly away when I need support to do it, I also don't like the idea of it although I know plenty of friends who swear by it.

My mum and mother in law both had this problem and both said they held us with no eye contact and carried on reading their book or sat quielty until we calmed down and then went to just a hand on stomach to reassure and then just being in the room doing something else, no attention just there and then to popping in and out until settled.  Also give a comforter and make sure you cuddle it with your baby so that it smelss of you to reassure them when you are not there.  It has worked with all my daughters but make sure you have duplicates and cuddle the spare when not in use so it is accepted!

I had a dummy as a baby my mother in law didn't agree with them, they have very different ideas on parenting and I thought it very strange they actually agreed with each other on this so I've been trying it for the last 3 weeks, I'm now just popping in and out and she seems to be getting used to settling herself, even with a perforated ear drum and cold! She made more fuss when I tried picing her up last night.

Hope it all goes well with your exams

My now 13mth old wouldn't sleep through until 10 months old, he was breastfed too and woke 3-4 times a night and sometimes just wouldn't re-settle without a feed at least twice a night!   Absolute  nightmare - the worse time ever!!  I regularly woke up that tired I would cry!   He would wake his brother up if I left him crying in the night and it controlled crying didn't work - 2hrs later we were all still awake!!  It didn't matter what we tried nothing worked.  He just decided to sleep through all by himself one day.  It was frustrating in a way because despite our best efforts nothing worked and he just grew out of it and learnt to settle himself.  Now if makes a murmur usually he settles himself and I don't need to go in.  If he does need me a quick cuddle and check and he's usually ok to be put back down and re-settles.

Sleep deprivation is absolutely the worst thing ever and you think it's never going to end, but it will I'm sure.  Try and relax about it because I got to worked up about it and nothing I did changed it until Charlie decided to sleep through himself!  

You're doing a fab job I'm sure so hang in there and I'm sure things will soon change.  As I'm sure you've worked now most things with babies/toddlers are phases and they grow out of it/change so quick.  

Do what you feels right that what my Health Visitor told me.  I felt cruel leaving him to cry and it didn't work anyway  for us. 

 Good luck with everything.  xxx

thanks for all the advice i gues i wil just do what feels right i dont like jay crying and he is getting there he wakes up 1nce through the night now he just whants a cuddle im used to it now

im not bothered that i dont get sleep he my son do anything for him and his daddy doesnt help he dont lyk baby cry it goes through him but wen jay isnt crying daddy is playing with havin a dad and son time so sweet

thank you agen for the adive  

xxxxx

thats what i do now like i said he just whants a cuddle orff his mammy and now this hot weather he would want me more becouse of the weather

thanks agen xxxx