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how to tell your partner the bad news

Chat < Pregnancy & Birth Clubs < Miscarriage & pregnancy loss

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  • NewUser70910999
    NewUser70910999

    19/09/2010 at 19:02

    PM
    Hi ladies,

    I have a bit of a dilemma. I am 99% sure I have miscarried (5+5) I've passed enough blood sorry for tmi. My dilemma is my husband does not know! He is away in the falklands with the military. I've not wanted too worry him incase it was nothing. Bleeding started on Thursday very light and knew that it could be something or nothing. Hoping it would be the nothing. He has only been there two weeks so only found out I was pregnant when he got there and told him straight away. Something to look forward for when he came back at Christmas. I just don't know were to start with telling him. I've know idea how he will react. How did other partners handle the news? I've always told him from the beginning that there was always a chance of miscarriage (a bit negative I know but I always like to be realistic) we have other problems (pcos and low thyroid) so wasn't going to be easy. I'm off to see my gp tomorrow don't know if he will suggest a scan or blood tests to confirm. So will wait till I've got some professional advice before telling him.

    Any advice ladies?

    Thanks.
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  • WindyMiller
    WindyMiller

    19/09/2010 at 19:36

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    Mapleleaf, I think you are so thoughtful thinking of others while you are going through this. Just remember that its likely that your partner will be much more concerned about your well-being and how you are feeling than disappointed- although I'm sure he will be.

    I hope you have friends or family that you can rely on while your partner is away.

    Look after yourself xxx
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  • tashelby
    tashelby

    21/09/2010 at 03:06

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    So sorry your going through this pet. I agree with WindyMiller in that your partner will be more concerned about you. I think your hubby would want to know and give you whatever support he can even though he is far away. Whatever happens you will have gone through it together. Good luck to you and I hope you have family and friend close by. Love Tracy xx
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  • kwn_32
    kwn_32

    26/09/2010 at 06:05

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    Hi Mapleleaf, i'm so sorry you're going through this without your husband. I couldn't have done that and it must be awful for you. Your hubby will be flown home on compassionate leave if his work know. Myself and husband are both in the RAF and know how it works, we've been through this twice (although we were together). You really need him with you and i'm sure he would want to be here too. Being so far away will just be awful for him and i'm sure he'd worry about you. Do you go to the med centre at his camp or have a civilian dr? If you tell the military docs they can arrange for him to be flown home for a small time, I can find out the compasion case phone no if you want? I really think you need to be together.

    As Tashelby says I hope you family and friends close by, you can't go through this alone. I hope you're ok xx
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