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Miscarriage & pregnancy loss
23/01/2015 at 01:23
Dearest ladies,I never believed I would happen to be here, writing about my experience that happened to me today. I have been 13 weeks and 4 days pregnant when I found out there is no heartbeat on my first scan today. I used to think this can not happen and honestly I was never even aware of anything like this, until I started browsing through Google and that's what I have been doing for a good month now. I guess that was the time when the little baby died, they said about week 8/9. I did feel different, I fealt like it stopped and I was worried, although I continued having morning sickness, sore breats...I wasn't as connected to the baby and to my belly as before. The real symptoms disappeared around the week 8/9..and I wondered whether I am still pregnant. I must have known but I would never believe it. When I told the lady who did the scan today that I am scared, she said I am being silly and that I shouldn't be worried. I guess she was a bit surprised when she found out about the bad news. i was shocked. I am having my first drink tonight and I will keep trying for a baby again, this time I am going for twins at least;-) since one is soon gone. The feeling of the baby inside, holding on to me, is kind of scary yet ...I can't describe. I am really tired so I am writing rubbish, I need to sleep and forget;-) lif goes on, doesn't it. This would have been my first, I am 34.
23/01/2015 at 11:34
So sorry for your loss, Sabi31.
Be kind to yourself.
23/01/2015 at 16:28
Thank you for your reply. I will be. I am sure everything happens for a reason and every lesson is good, although sometimes very painful.
23/01/2015 at 16:35
You are very philosophical, Sabi31. I just wanted to scream at the world about the injustice of it all!
If you fancy a chat with others who know exactly what you're going through, there are some very lovely ladies over on this thread: http://www.madeformums.com/forum/trying-to-conceive/trying-to-get-pregnant-after-a-miscarriage-part2/169762.html (don't be put off by the title; it's very much all about sharing the experience of miscarriage) and also over here on this thread: http://www.madeformums.com/forum/trying-to-conceive/this-emotional-rollercoaster-after-a-miscarriage/169814.html
Wishing you all the best...
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