Pregnancy & Birth Clubs <
11/05/2014 at 09:35
Im sorry for a mopey post but I feel really quite low and down today and I don't know where else to turn. I could happily just sit here and cry and in face yesterday morning, I did break down in tears.
I have previously suffered from depression and anxiety for about 3 years and have been successfully off my medication for about a year. I am very close to my husband and I would say, he is truly the only real friend I have. We aren't from the area we live in and other than my parents, I only really have work colleagues nearby.
Hubby has recently had a shift change which works to our advantage as he is now contracted for more hours but it also means he now works alternate weekends. He has done this before and it never bothered me. I would happily go to my parents or entertain myself when he wasn't here. Yesterday, after he left for work, I sat in my lounge and just cried and cried. All I could think about is that soon, I'll have a little baby and be on my own with him/her when hubby goes to work and how the hell am I going to cope.
I don't want to be on my own when he's at work because I get lonely and bored but then I also feel like I CBA going out or even doing the household tasks that I know will pass time.
Is this a normal feeling? Or is it something more like my depression coming back? I want to get out and about to meet new friends etc but I am quite nervous in new situations and then think well I cant have it both ways. I just feel like all I have is my hubby and that I don't have any other support network (other than my parents) and I'm going to be all alone when this baby comes and hubby goes back to work.
If you're still reading this, thanks so much for taking the time to "listen" x
11/05/2014 at 09:43
Hey Mrs W, sorry you are feeling so low. Just think though, soon you will have a lovely baby to keep you busy and you will have loads of opportunities to meet other new mum's at postnatal groups etc. Make sure that you sign up for loads of groups through you GP and children's centre and you will have people who are going through the same things to support you.
I was quite depressed during my first pregnancy but for me it passed, might be worth seeing the GP just to be sure
11/05/2014 at 11:31
11/05/2014 at 11:42
I know exactly how you feeI I've had recurring depression and anxiety for years. I don't really have friends as such, I have people I talk to at work but no one that I socialise with outside of work.
At the moment I'm worried about how I'll be once my oh goes back to work.
Personally I think that at the moment it is just that we are worrying due to the hormones in pregnancy that effect even the most confident women amongst us. If you find yourself doing nothing but worrying though i do think you should mention it to your Midwife and Dr.
There also seems to be alot of very supportive ladies on here who I am sure would happily respond to our posts and give us pep talks when/if we are feeling a bit m'eh. I for one dont mind if you even want to message me direct.
You wait I bet when our babies arrive we will be too busy just cooing over them to even have time to feel lonely
11/05/2014 at 11:58
Thanks for your lovely replies girls. Ive motivated myself to wash some bits of baby's stuff (bouncy chair cover and towels etc) and done a spot of housework. I need to get a shower and pop out to get a few bits from the supermarket but at the mo im sitting with a cup of tea.
Hopefully, its just a lull due to pregnancy hormones. I even found myself talking to baby W today saying how scared I am but I will be the best Mum I can be. Hopefully, talking out loud like this will help too as it kinda gets it "out" there.
Thanks again xx
12/05/2014 at 03:39
12/05/2014 at 12:43
Thanks for all your lovely replies girls. I am going to make the effort to get myself out there and rather than force myself to be "brave" and stay at home on my own, get out there. Yesterday I worked myself up into such a state and my mum phoned. She was horrified at how upset I was and persuaded me to pop down for a cuppa. And like she said, I had already been alone for maybe 6 hours which was a great achievement. I felt so much better after I had been down there for an hour or so.
I have a colleague at work, who although she drives me nuts sometimes, is on mat leave at the same time as me so I texted her yesterday and said it would be great if we could meet up etc when we're both off.
I will NOT let this get me down!
12/05/2014 at 23:14
Hi im sorry to hear you are feeling so down and isolated. Pregnancy is a difficult time there are hormones flying about but also you start focusing on what will happen after and being alone with the baby, I feel lonely and isolated when my OH is working he does one week days and one week nights so there will be a whole week not seeing him and its lonely. I think it is so hard to meet new people when you are older than when we were 18 and we end up isolated as we spend so much time with OH. I think the lovely ladies above have given good suggestions. When baby comes try and get involved in mother and baby groups, meet people in the same situation when you go at first you can just talk and play with baby until it gets easier. Take baby out for walks its good for your physical and mental health but also babies health. I think its good you know when you are starting to feel low as it means you can do something about it. Ive suffered with depression on and off throughout my life and its easily just to slip down that road again. But try and look forward and use the support here there is always someone on to talk too. Take care. xx
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