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24/07/2013 at 19:31
I think my bf journey might have to come to an end. I'm really sad about this, despite J being 13 months, and not really needing the milk any more, I like the closeness, and wanted to stop on his terms not mine. But, every time he feeds, he sort of kneads my boob with both hands, he makes a fist and pushes it into my boob as hard as he can, which hurts in itself, but has the side effect of pulling the boob out of his mouth a bit, and so the latch becomes shallower and my nipples get sore. They're not quite as sore as the newborn days, but if H goes near them he's getting snapped at to keep off, and it hurts every time J latches. I've tried asking him nicely to stop doing it, I've tried asking him less nicely to stop doing it, I've repeatedly taken his hands away and said no, I've given him a toy in each hand to play with (which works for a bit then he drops it and goes back to the kneading.) He's too young to reason with, and is getting upset when I try to hold his hands off me, so I don't know what else to do but stop feeding. :-(
Any advice on either anything else to try, or failing that, how did you go about stopping bf? I only feed morning and night so hopefully won't have massive engorgement issues, can I just go cold turkey?
Thanks in advance from a sore and slightly teary Spikeygoodness!
24/07/2013 at 19:59
Do you want to stop? There's some good advice on kellymom re nursing manners, I'll try and find the link. The kneading sounds like he could be trying to encourage your supply/let down, are you eating and drinking plenty? Also maybe try nursing leaning forward to get gravity on your side! What about swaddling his top half to keep the arms down?
If this is the end 13 months is amazing, well done!
24/07/2013 at 22:14
Is he happy drinking water/cows milk from something else i.e. bottle or cup? I'd make sure he could do this before going cold turkey on him.
He has probably learnt that extra stimulation from his hands causes an additional let down - less effort for him in the sucking department! Lazy boy ;-)
If you do go cold turkey, its okay to pump a little (not a full feeds worth) just to relieve any engorgement - your supply will then gradually dry up and fingers crossed, no matitus.
I wanted to stop when L was a year old. She was feeding a lot more than twice a day tho. And still at night. It took until she was 14months until something clicked, she could run round holding a sippy cup of milk and dropped majority of daytime feeds. Phew. The relief was great - so much so i was happy to continue BFing her to sleep in the evening and the occasional morning or whatever until she was 19months.
Be warned. Boobs go saggy once your milk has dried up after long term BFing. Gotta get preggers again to get them lookin half decent again
25/07/2013 at 14:40
Thanks Isis and HF.
I've had a look at the Kellymom links, and they mostly suggest things I've been trying, I don't think there's anything revolutionary there that I'd not thought of. He quite possibly is trying to stimulate a better let down, I've always suspected my milk supply is a bit rubbish (we had a rotten start to bf and had to use shields, I've never ever leaked, and can't pump much - none of which is conclusive I know, and he fed exclusively for 6 months and tracked his curve so he can't have been starving) and I really really don't feel like I have much left now, if he doesn't take much of one of his feeds, which happens for the evening feed sometimes if he's distracted, I don't get massively engorged the next day. He's fine with both cow's milk and water from a sippy cup, he doesn't take masses of cow's milk, maybe 3 oz a couple of times a day, but he also has yoghurt and cheese & milk on cereal so he's probably ok. He's a massive eater generally, and I don't really have any worries about his nutrition if I stop, I just want to keep the closeness, bonding, and tantrum-blitzing powers of boob for a bit longer!
My boobs are already saggy!! They romped from an E cup to a J cup during pregnancy and when my milk came in, and they've since shrunk to a G with the spare skin from the J left over. :-( I dread to think how bad they're going to look if/when they go back to an E. That said, I took my last pill today, with a NTNP plan for the next couple of months (H says I'm not allowed to pee on sticks until we've been trying for a while, and can't "go all crazy" again) so they may improve again soon!
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