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30/04/2013 at 14:48
I am really struggling with bfing P. Saturday was the worst day. I was in hospital still and P started to feed at 6am and she was still feeding, going from boob to boob until 4pm. I was so sore. On Sunday night she did the same and i know its just to get the milk flow going, but i was so tired and sore i eventually sent H downstairs at 4am to do a bottle and she took 1oz formula. I just laid in bed crying feeling like i am letting P down by not persevering. H has been great and it very supportive but i wanted to try and solely breastfeed.I am on a slippery slope now as i topped her up with 2oz formula last night too. Today she was bfing from 11am till 2pm without a break and was still crying inconsolably for more so she has had more formula.
I am sitting here crying as i feel like i am letting P down as i know the bfing situation will only get worse the more formula i give her but i cant listen to her crying with hunger. I am also so sore i can bearly stand bfing at times if she has been feeding for hours. I also have G to think of snd when H goes back to work i cant practically spend 2-3 hours feeding at a time. I just feel so guilty like i am giving up on bfing P after 5 days.
30/04/2013 at 14:56
You are not letting P down. However you feed her really does not matter. What's important is that you are feeding her, loving her and looking after her! YOU need to make a decision about what you want to do. You need to either drop the formula and persevere with BFing (it WILL get easier eventually) or you need be happy with the decision to FF or mix feed. Your milk supply will not be enough if you keep topping up with formula though. Are you sure it is hunger? E was similar and wanted to be on me all the time, mostly for comfort. I completely understand the BFing a baby with a toddler issue, it had a big impact on my recent decision to stop and I'm very happy with that decision as I can give so much more time to E. Don't beat yourself up, do what is right for you (a happy mummy makes a happy baby) xxxx
30/04/2013 at 15:11
Thanks WS. Yes i think its hunger just because last night and today she really guzzled the formula down. I had these issues with G and mixed feeding did work really well but i dont think i gave her formula for a couple of weeks.
I have to say that for the first time since we came home on Sat, P is happily kicking around in her moses basket instead of crying or just sleeping which has made me feel happier.
Its just so tough....
30/04/2013 at 15:12
Big hugs MM, I'm so sorry you're struggling. If you do want to continue, drop the formula and it WILL get better. Small babies often mistake wind for hunger, could she need more winding?
30/04/2013 at 15:35
I think you know the answer MM. I'm not telling you what to do, but if she is happier after the bottle perhaps that's the right thing for her, and for you. We put too much pressure on ourselves to BF and it's just silly. Your babies are just as happy and healthy as babies who are BFd for weeks/months/years. At least you have given it a shot lovely, I know it is tough but in a few months you won't even think about it. I certainly didn't after E and I'm not feeling any guilt with M, he is happy and content (and quite a bit chubbier ) xx
30/04/2013 at 15:39
Big hugs. It's so hard in the beginning but if you do decide to drop the formula your supply will catch up very very quickly. It's very difficult to bfeed with a toddler but i just make sure we have puzzles and books or cartoons to watch and snuggle time when B is havibg a marathon session and we are still going strong at 12 wks. You have to do what makes you happy though x
30/04/2013 at 16:26
Please don't beat yourself up, it is so bloody hard.
I didn't manage to feed I so am trying again this time. We are at 12 days in now and it is going ok after a very bumpy start. We resorted to nipple shields after a couple of days as she wouldn't latch and my nips were covered in blisters It seems to be going well for now but we are taking each day at a time and I have no idea how it will work when H goes back to work as I is so used to getting lots of attention.
If you need to stop then stop and if you want to keep trying moan on here and take each day at a time, Maybe we should have a middle of the night thread to keep us all sane?!!
Eat lots of oats, take fenugreek and do some skin to skin which should all help with supply. Look at me with advice after 12 days
No idea re dealing with the other child as I was about to post asking for advice there.
30/04/2013 at 17:45
Thanks everyone. Well the midwife has just been to weigh P at 5 days abd she has lost too much weight so i have been told to do breast compressions whilst feeding, let her feed for no more than 30 mins each side and offer top up formula after every feed to try and get her weight up. I cant beat myself up any more over it as i have now been told its what i need to do to avoid P being readmitted.
30/04/2013 at 17:46
Oh gosh, I hope her weight goes up soon. What is she now? I hope this makes it an easier decision xx
30/04/2013 at 17:51
She wad 8lbs at birth and is now 7lbs 6oz which is an 8.5% loss. They readmit if they lose 10%. She is being reweighed in 2 days....
30/04/2013 at 18:04
Fingers crossed she starts to gain x
30/04/2013 at 18:18
Mm, I really feel for you. I never bf my first but decided to try with my second. He was wanting to be fed constantly. I did managed to express but he guzzled it down so quickly along with formula we decided to give up after about 2 weeks as I felt that I didn't have the time to commit to it along with having a 2 year old to look after especially when h went back to work. I was in tears most of then time and kept on wondering if I'd made the right decision. Your hormones are all over the place still and the guilt you feel in the early days is very tough.
Try not to feel so bad if you do decide to give up, but if you want to persevere there is help out there x
30/04/2013 at 18:23
I'm sure she'll pick up in her weight soon... A lost 8.6% and we weren't advised to do anything different than what we were (we didn't give formula but had a bumpy bf start) and she started gaining weight nicely. I'm sure that if you do as they say then she'll pile the weight back on xxx
30/04/2013 at 18:29
Thank you. I am not intending to give up bfing as i love that special bond but i am happy to mixed feed certainly until P's weight increases.
30/04/2013 at 18:53
Just v quickly - has she been checked by a lactation consultant for a tongue tie? It sounds to me like she has a serious milk transfer problem and that you have latch issues. This may well be caused by a TT - they are often missed.
Also google flipple and deep latch technique - both should help you.
There is absolutely NO harm in formula feeding, but if you want to give BF one more try I think you need to shout for some proper professional (not just MW) support.
Good luck - and whatever you end up doing, ensuring your baby is fed and happy is all that matters.
30/04/2013 at 19:55
I echo what SL says, it does sound like she's struggling to get milk from you.
Is your milk in? Do your boobs feel like they are emptying when she feeds? Softer / not hard etc.
If you want to give BF a good chance then I think you need to see a Lactation Consultant ASAP and have her checked for TT.
You can find a private one here: www.lcgb.org/consultants_local_south_east_england.html
Or is there a BFing cafe near you or session at your hospital?
01/05/2013 at 16:08
Thanks everyone. I have a bf lady coming tomorrow so i will definitely be asking about tongue tie. Could make sense.....
04/05/2013 at 10:49
Is there any update MM? How are you doing? Xxx
04/05/2013 at 11:12
I found breastfeeding agony, at about 24 hours old i asked for formula as i was exhausted, i tried to feed her till she was 3 days old but i was in agony crying everytime. In the end i expressedfor a month with occasional Formula feeds, then went to FF i wish i had never given up. And would say try to stick with it but make sure you try to get a breastfeeding councillor or a health visitor. Here the health visiting team will come everyday to help if needed. Good luck x
04/05/2013 at 13:57
Its going ok. P has put weight on with the formula top ups so thats good. I am still topping her up overnight but just BFing during the day and its working really well. No obvious tongue tie. Thank you for asking xx
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