Pregnancy & Birth Clubs <
31/12/2015 at 07:47
Hi all, So just got bfp with #3 yesterday, but not told dh yet!!!! I have liked the idea of a third for a while but dh not so keen. It's confusing though as some days he says yes and seems ok(ish) about it (although I suspect more for me than him) and then he quickly reverts back saying he doesn't want any more kids. Then he says yes again and happily does dtd around ov time, then a week later back to saying no!!!! Anyway we haven't been careful for the last few months now so this shouldn't come as a huge shock. I brought up the subject yesterday (before poas) told him I was two days late for af and his reaction wasn't great. He got really uptight and starting going on about how are youngest son wouldn't like it..... This really upset me. Later that day I poas and BFP!!! Now I'mso worried of a negative reaction from, I'm worried to tell him :-( Has anyone else been in a similar situation? Sorry for the long post!xx
02/01/2016 at 00:05
Hi, I'm pregnant with #3 also!
My husband was the same for a while saying yes then no, then yes then no lol.... each time he said yes, then the next morning he said no so I would have to go and get the morning after pill! It drove me crazy, not to mention mucked up my body! so one day I just broke down in tears and told him how much this was affecting me!!
turns out that he never realised he was actually doing what he was doing, he apologised over and over and said real reason was because he was scared, scared of finances, he's the main bread winner, scared of having another child, as its of course a big decision so he kept bottling it! So we decided, as adults, to wait until we were certain!
i think we would have continued the way we were if I hadn't of put a stop to it myself, this is my last child so I wanted it to be a happy occasion....
i know you're in this situation now, but i think that you should just tell him, and then have a big heart to heart, talk about all your worries etc! It's good to talk!
We decided a couple of months afterwards to try, we thought "lifes to short, and anything can happen" anyone can have a secure job and then lose it later on.... It's life and we will deal with it as a family together!
good luck! I hope all goes well and would love to hear back from you x
03/01/2016 at 18:46
Thank you so much for your reply Hollsbxx. It's really nice to hear from someone who has experienced something similar, and now in a happy place. Congrats to you 😀
After reading your post I took your advice and spoke to DH today (yes I've held this in for like 4 days!!!!! Not sure how!!) He's initial reaction wasn't fantastic to be fair, but we talked! He also is worried about finances and just the thought of having 3 children, a bit scared I think. Also that all our plans for this year like holidays etc would need to be put on hold.
Anyway end result after looking at both positives and negatives was pretty good. Don't get me wrong he isnt doing cartwheels about it lol but he is ok.
And I feel so relived that we have actually talked about it and how we both feel.
Thank you again for your advice.
When are you due btw? xxx
03/01/2016 at 20:13
Wow poor you!! That must have been hard to do but I'm so glad to hear that you talked! It definitely is a worry at times, even if you do have a secure job!! im sure things will get much better now though especially when everything sinks in And excitement is sure to build! no matter the worries, babies Bring lots of happiness :) just remember to keep taking :)
im due 10th March with a baby girl! When so you think your due date will be? Will you find out? Xx
04/01/2016 at 10:22
Yes absolutely. Our boys are our world and now we are being blessed with another 😊
Ah how lovely a little girl. What do you have already?
We have two boys, so would love for a daughter next but obviously be happy with a healthy boy too. I found out with both my boys, would like to try holding out this time and wait for the surprise.... But not sure I'm patient enough lol.
Have worked due date out to be 6th Sept.
04/01/2016 at 12:18
We left the decision down to the children weather they wanted to find out or not, we have one of each and we found out both times
04/01/2016 at 12:19
Sorry pressed send before finishing.....
04/01/2016 at 12:24
We found out both times before so this time we weren't going to find out but thought we would let the children have the choice :) we booked a private scan so that they could see baby anyway, and let them decide and of course they wanted too....i feel it was the best decision we made! The amazement in their faces just to see baby, and the excitement when they found out, they hugged and jumped for joy screaming, it made it so much more personal and special other than the midwife just telling us at the end :) they got to chose the first outfits afterwards also! They are 5 and 6 :)
if you find out or not will be what's right for you all! Exciting!! hope first scan comes round quick!! Xx
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