Pregnancy & Birth Clubs <
17/05/2014 at 00:04
How are you both doing sleep-wise?!
We've found a solution that seems to work for us right now... H sleeps in with A in the spare room, on a double mattress on the floor. I have our (mine and H's) double bed to myself. H is a really heavy sleeper but A is old enough now for me not to worry about the safety of cosleeping. H sleeps through A's little nocturnal grumblings, hair-grabbing etc, so H is happy. A has someone to attack in the night, so he's happy. I get to sleep all night... so I'm happy! I don't think it can go on forever really but for the time being it's suiting us.
I would not say A sleeps through now, because a few times we've left him in his bed and H has come to sleep with me, and once A slept through until about 5am but every other time he stirred in the night and then cried when no-one was there for him, so he wouldn't sleep if left alone. But he doesn't wake properly if H is there, he likes to run his fingers through hair in his sleep. I'm half-tempted to buy one of those hairdressing dolls to see if he'd be happy to play with that in his sleep instead!
17/05/2014 at 23:58
Hi Saisi - glad to hear things have improved although they are still not brilliant which must be hard when you are pregnant as well. The hairdressing doll made me chuckle!
Our sleep is still rubbish. WKing every couple of hours on a good night less on a bad. Plus he won't go down in an evening so us up until 10.30-11 which is draining! It doesn't matter how much he does in the day or if he naps (unless it's a late nap in which case it's a later bed!). We are still co sleeping with my H in the spare room which is not ideal at all but needs must.
We move house in 2 weeks and then I need to tackle his sleep, I'm just not sure how. We have our first night away from him in 3 weeks as well so that might help steer us toward a solution as he will have to do something when I'm not here.
He still feeds in the night but I know he's not waking for food just comfort - did you find giving up bf helped with his sleep?
I just keep thinking it has to get better sometime!
19/05/2014 at 00:28
Hi LM. Sorry to hear the sleep is still not good :( I actually night weaned him before giving up BFing completely. I dropped him down to every 3 hours, then one feed a night, and then later he dropped that one feed himself. It was so hard, I won't lie, but ultimately completely worth it as like you I knew he was just waking for comfort/habit. I used something similar to the Jay Gordon method - if you google it, it should come up. It's suited for cosleepers. My hope was that once he wasn't waking for feeds, he would just sleep through, and we could put him down in his room and then H and I would sleep in ours. But I think A has replaced the feeding with needing to play with hair in his sleep. I tried and tried to get him onto a comforter but he wouldn't have it! I am more and more seriously thinking about the hairdressing doll... might be worth a go!!
19/05/2014 at 10:08
Can I join this club please?!
My boy is just about to turn 1 and ends up in with me 99% of the time about 4am. His sleep is so random though and on Saturday night he went from 8pm - 6.30am with no dream feed and no crying. We did resort to doing CC about 2 months ago and whilst it wasn't the best thing at the time it has helped a lot. He can now get himself off to sleep on his own including for naps (although only for me) and we have a better routine now as well. If he cries during the night I go in and bf him and then put him in his cot. He might cry but I leave him for a minute and then return, give him a cuddle, attempt to feed again and he usually refuses this so it's back in the cot and usually he goes back to sleep but at 4am it's a different story.
Last night he cried every 90 mins even when in with me.
A good night (apart from the sleeping through fluke) is a wake up at 2am, 4am in with me, get back to sleep about 5am and wake up for the day anytime from 5.30-6.30am.
It's slowly killing me as I'm now working full time. I think I'd be happy to just co sleep fully if he would sleep the whole night but it makes no difference. I can see some progress though with the CC as at least I'm not spending 1-2 hours just to get him to sleep at bedtime. It would be nice if he would go to bed for daddy or to stay over at my parents but he just won't settle and wants to bf anyway after his bottle so no night off for me in the near future.
04/06/2014 at 21:44
Hello poor sleeping Mamas!
I am embarrassingly late to this I realise... I was on holiday for a couple of weeks, then did spy it on my return and never seemed to have long enough to reply properly... And when I had time, I had no memory. Sorry!
Saisi - That's such good news about A. What a massive difference, I'm so pleased to read it. Last time IIRC, you had stopped or were reducing the night feeds and had had one really good night with him - and your hair! I hope things continue to improve / go well, and that you and your H can eventually be reunited... But, the main thing is of course your are getting some rest! When are you due BTW? I hope you are feeling ok :)
LM - How did the house move go? Hope things aren't too chaotic. Which house did you go for in the end BTW?? I'm really sorry things are still bad. You must be so exhausted and fed up :( Is H getting anymore sleep in the day? I think last time naps were a bit miss. I hope you are managing to get some rest in somewhere and that H is ok in himself... Bar being a little tinker at night ;)
TP - How are things now? Your nights sound pretty tough, and I found the unpredictability difficult as well, not knowing what horrors the night had in store is hard. Did you see my reply a while ago about that early wake up thing? Not sure if it would work of course, and it goes against every instinct purposefully waking them doesn't it? I hope things are starting to get better.
After the last sleep thread, something inside me died and I realised I just couldn't carry on the way it was, so I cut out rocking - cold turkey and everything! I stayed with S, repeatedly lying him back in his cot and saying sleepy time, had my hand on him etc. and just waited it out - survival of the stubborn! It was taking 45-60m for him to go to sleep, but shortened after a few days and he also began sleeping through!!! I was not expecting that at all, but it seemed once he could nod off and get comfy himself in his cot, when he stirred, he found it easy to turn / shuffle or whatever and resettle. I ended up rocking again a few weeks after as he was ill for pretty much 2 months, but his sleep remained better, and we've just started the SS again today, as he's way too big to be rocked now and it seems to annoy him a lot of the time! Tonight took 50 minutes but no upset and I'm hoping the length of time will reduce. He often wakes at 5ish, stuck on his stomach and it's 50/50 whether he'll go back off once I flip him, or end up in with us, but OBVIOUSLY, I'm not complaining, as it's a million times better than it was and I'd happily accept this as our lot for the foreseeable.
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