Pregnancy & Birth Clubs <
13/04/2013 at 17:08
I took G to the park this afternoon and it suddenly hit me that our lives are about to change forever. I am so excited about having another baby but on the other side of the coin these are the last few weeks for us as a family of 3 and i will have to share my time and affection with another little person. G and i are so close and i worry we will lose that and suddenly feel very weepy and emotional about it all.
Did anyone else feel like this just before their second was due??
13/04/2013 at 17:41
Yes I did. It was just N for 4 years and I was scared how our relationship would be affected. I knew he'd be ok with the baby and he is brilliant with her. When I first came out of hospital he didn't seem to know how to be with me but we got back on track after H went back to work and a bit of normality returned. I just make sure that he gets lots of cuddles, I spend time with him doing something he wants to do when A is sleeping so he doesn't feel pushed out. I think he's ok with it, he seems happy! I still feel guilty all the time but I'm hoping as she gets older this will get better. You will always have your special bond with G though and it will be worth it to see the sibling relationship too.
13/04/2013 at 17:42
Perfectly normal. You won't lose the closeness, in fact I found my bond with O got better with L being here as O adores her.
13/04/2013 at 18:04
I had this when we went for second scan. I think once we found out gender, it made it more real? I'm really tired at the moment and feeling a bit low,and my boy is being very clingy to me so that probably hasn't helped.
I wonder how I can manage to give enough to baby, son, hubby and dog. I also wonder how I will cope when hubby is away from home (away all this week). I also worry about still being 'me' as well as wife and Mum. I struggle with that a bit already!
It'll all be ok in the end though. It's like what you go through for #1, only slightly worse as you know exactly what a new baby entails, but you already get pretty stretched with your energies by the one you have!
13/04/2013 at 18:09
Yeah i know it will all be fine. I just feel a bit emotional that my relationship with G will change one way or another. She will be great with the baby - she is so excited. I am going to make sure i involve her with as much as i can and still find time for just her when baby is sleeping etc.
13/04/2013 at 18:35
I think the pregnancy has actually been harder than once baby arrives. I was so ill for the first 5-6 months and am exhausted most the time now and too big to really play much. Daddy is the fun one at the moment. But S is so looking forward to 'his baby' arriving and I just know he'll be great with him (he's fantastic with my little niece). I think the dynamic will change but not for the worse necessarily. At least he'll have normal mummy back! I guess you just need to make sure you get time alone with each one
13/04/2013 at 18:37
Oh yes, I had that.
C had been an only child for 7.5 yrs by the time J came along, and I was terrified of what effect having another baby would have on my relationship with C.
We had a friendship, aswell as a Mother and son relationship, and luckily we still have that. C adjusted well, and he absolutely dotes on his little brother. He regularly says "Mum, I love having a brother", makes me melt.
I make time for C and me to do stuff just the 2 of us, which is fab. We have Mother and son "date nights". Instead of having one amazing boy in my life, I now have 2.
Actually WH i agree with you - i am not much fun at the moment as i cant run around and couldnt lift her into the swings at the park and when i keep crying or am tired i am not a fun mummy!
14/04/2013 at 10:18
definately had this feeling, although A is 11 years old so it has been just him for soo long i was really tearful about loosing the bond we have.
14/04/2013 at 11:51
Totally! It was something I really thought about lots towards the end of my pregnancy. Just over a year on now, and yes things are very different BUT in a good way. R is becoming her own little person now and both girls are so similar and yet so different. It's lovely to see them starting to play together and I think they both get much more out of having a sibling than they would from being a one and only.
14/04/2013 at 16:15
yes, that's why he was spoilt absolutely rotten at Christmas as baby no 2 was due at new year's. It was fine in the end, altho it sounds improbable you do find love for another and there will be days the older one will get jealous but she (& you)! will appreciate having a playmate in a few years time. One thing I did with mine that helped was I had my son introduce her to everyone, he loved doing it as it got some attention for him as well, altho he was still introducing our 'new baby' to people when she was a year old!
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