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19/06/2014 at 12:47
I'm just wondering if anybody has had similar problems to me and what you did?
I work full time so am never home before 6, we have a quick dinner and then a short play before C (2) goes to bed. I just can't get her to stay in bed. she cries, screams and constantly gets out. The problem is I start to get annoyed because I'm usuaully tired too and need to get things done in the evening so I find myself loosing my temper and often have to walk away to calm down - this just makes her worse.
I feel like a bad mum, and wondering if anybody has any suggestions.
19/06/2014 at 14:38
I've had this with L (she's 17 months and we've had to take the side off the cot as she hated it) and O when he was a similar age. I work PT but on the days I do work, I'm usually in after 6pm. What I've done is get them in bed (they share a room), read stories and then sit with them until the drift off. I would rub L's tummy and hush her to calm her down so she would drift off. It's not ideal but I had to get her to love her bed and now she's quite happy in it. What things are you having to do in the evening?
Oh and you're not a bad mum x
19/06/2014 at 14:47
Thanks for the replies DumbleSpud, I felt like a very bad mum last night as in the end H had to come in and settle her as things were getting so bad.
C and E don't share a room at the moment as C is such a light sleeper, but maybe I should think about putting them together, I'm just worried that changing bedrooms will make her worse not better.
I try to do all my cleaning, tidying, organising family stuff etc in the evenings so I can enjoy my weekends with the girls. The later C settles the later i get finished and I end up with no time to relax before bed.
19/06/2014 at 19:54
I can't offer any advice I'm afraid as we're having issues with our 2 year old staying in his bed. If he's not that tired he'll get out of bed and start getting his toys out or he'll venture into our room and mess about on the bed. If he does happen to fall asleep in his own bed, more often than not he comes into us during the night. Last night he woke up screaming apparently because of a spider and now tonight he doesn't want to go in his room. I'm hoping it's a phase as I'm not really sure how to deal with it x
19/06/2014 at 21:33
J has regressed hugely the last couple of weeks, it's taking him over an hour to settle and he's crying/screaming for lts of that. I'm hoping it's just a phase or related to V's arrival and will pass soon. So no advice here, but you have my sympathies.
19/06/2014 at 21:45
I'm glad I'm not the only one having issues with sleep! e is 2 next month and for about the past 6 weeks has taken forever to get to sleep then is waking through the night and then is up for the day at 5am - it's exhausting! You're definitely not a bad mummy - I'm shattered come their bedtime and I don't go to work.
I also sit with e until she falls asleep. She went through a face where she would only sleep if I lay my head next to hers so she could play with my hair (not the most comfortable thing to do when they're in a toddler bed!) but I've now got it down to just a hand on her back for a few minutes then just sitting with her till she's asleep. I've this week got her a groclock to offer a bit of light during the night as a comfort but also to help with the night waking/early rising. I just keep emphasising that the stars out that means it's time for sleep. I'm hoping it works! I really hope this is a short lived phase for you and us all! x
19/06/2014 at 22:27
I'm so sorry that there are so many others with the same issue, but also secretly a bit relieved that it might just be a phase they all go through. I'm going to try being more relaxed and hope it stops soon.
Thanks fir all your comments, maybe somebody will come along with a miracle curd fir us all - make it soon please :)
19/06/2014 at 23:47
I'm exactly the same, I was hoping it was a stage for Isobelle but it's been around 3 or 4 months now. In fact this evening we thought it was too good to be true that she'd gone straight to sleep & it turned out she'd climbed into our bed & was reading her books, telling my hubby that she was sleeping in mummys bed tonight. Seems like there are lots of us in the same position so clearly it's an age thing! Will keep an eye on this thread for tips!
25/06/2014 at 12:31
Thanks guys, its been really helpful knowing this is probably a phase and has helped me to relax a bit when dealing with it and we do seem to be making progress.
I've actually made some changes and moved a chair out of her room so she now has her bedtime story in bed - she doesn't stay there yet, but she is getting into it voluntarily which is a good start. We also moved the bed a bit to see if it helps, and she seems to have decided to change ends which is not something I thought of - but I suppose she could have been uncomfortable in some way.
We still do bedtime routine the same as before, but when I've finsihed and put her into bed I've been putting a baby gate across the door - so she can still hera me moveing around but can't get out. Sometimes she cries about it, sometimes she just has a play and then drops off to sleep, but for the past 2 nights she's actully been asleep by 8pm.
Its still frustrating as she's quite tired, but I don't feel quite so horrid anymore.
How's everybody else getting on?
25/06/2014 at 14:43
nftfi: great to hear that you're making progress, it can be so wearing.
I haven't really made any changes but things are slowly improving for us. She might come out of her room maybe once or twice but rarely any more now. Think I've been more strict. She likes to go to sleep with books which I didn't let her do (trying to encourage her to cuddle of soft toys instead & she knows if she gets out of bed then those books get taken away. However, we're aiming to start toilet training her in Aug (or maybe sooner so we sit her on the toilet before her nap & sleep & she stays in bed if she's done a poo but otherwise she gets out of her room to go & use the toilet again which I can't really say no to!
25/06/2014 at 15:10
Blackkat - my eldest daughter likes to go to bed with a book, I have to move them from the bed when she's asleep. Glad things are slowly getting there for you, potty training brings a whole new set of problems doesn't it. you can't ignore a child who says they want to go to the toilet - even if you know they dont!!
25/06/2014 at 15:33
Yes I have to remove the books as she literally falls asleep cuddling them, if she's asleep on them I just leave them. Her current favourite is the brochure of where we're going on holiday (the holiday book). But if it helps her to stay settled then it's fine by me. I guess you have to learn to pick your battles. We're moving her into another room in Aug too (so we don't have to redecorate the nursery for the new baby) & as we live in a town house she'll then be on the 1st floor rather than on the 2nd with us so I imagine it'll be more fun & games, although at least then she'll be next to the toilet!! Good luck with yours x
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