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11/04/2013 at 17:23
A will just not settle and is screaming away. I've changed nappy and offered breast but all he wants is to be walked up and down (won't go in bouncy seat, has to be walking, and won't tolerate even standing still holding him, or the sling).
I cannot walk him any more. My back is getting worse and worse from lifting him/sitting in bed to feed etc and the walking around is now causing shooting pains.
So I've sat on the sofa holding him as I don't want to leave him to cry alone. First time he screamed for about 5 minutes then fell asleep on me, which was fine.
Then the bloody telephone woke him and now he's been screaming again for what feels like an eternity. He's crying, I'm crying. I've walked him as much as I can bear but he starts screaming again as soon as I sit down, which I need to due to the pain and not wanting to make it worse for the future. Offered boob again but he won't take it, even though it normally calms him even if he isn't hungry.
Am I being an awful parent for not just doing what he wants? He's in the same position just I'm not moving!! Tried rocking him but no go.
I've always said I didn't want to let him just "cry it out" but I don't know what the frig else to do.
OMG he's just stopped. Finally. I still feel bad though, My poor little boy but also I don't want to risk REALLY putting my back out because then where will we be?!
11/04/2013 at 17:25
*** hell he's started again. Kill me now
11/04/2013 at 17:26
Oh dear, have you tried putting him in the pushchair and pushing him back and forth so that you can at least sit down and do that
11/04/2013 at 17:33
Sometimes babies cry, and despite trying everything there is nothing we can do to make them stop. This really isn't 'cry it out' though, you are there and comforting him and he knows that. Sounds like he's probably over tired by now and he will settle in his own time, so just do whatever it takes to get through it and don't be afraid to leave him for a few minutes if you need a break, he will be fine.
11/04/2013 at 17:42
Thank you ladies. H has come home and is walking him around now. Feeling a bit better!
11/04/2013 at 17:59
Sorry to hear you're having a bad day. I'm sure we've all been there, I know I have! It's so difficult when you're all out of things to do to stop the crying. And you have to think of yourself too, and if your back's hurting you have to try and look after yourself. They look so small, but they're hefty little things! As for being an awful parent, no, you're not. You're doing your best to satisfy his needs, so you're doing a great job. Someitmes babies can't be comforted. If it's any comfort to you, I read somewhere that babies are happy if their needs and wants are met a third of the time. And I'm absolutely certain you're doing that.
Hope you're managing to relax a bit now that H is home.
11/04/2013 at 18:55
Sorry you've had a bad day lovely, it's the screaming that gets to me too. I'm glad your H is home and that you feel better, Would taking him out for a walk help if it happens in te future? Or out in the car if you drive.
11/04/2013 at 19:23
On days like that I used to put mine in the pram and go for a walk. Its horrid and makes you feel so desperate but sometimes babies just have days like that. It will pass.
11/04/2013 at 19:28
Was going to say where's H? You don't have a car do you? Second pittig him in pram and just going for a little walk or even sit as push back and forth? Henry's the same tonight. Trying to persevere with the sling but he knows as soon as I sit down!!
11/04/2013 at 19:33
J went through a stage of this- have you tried playing music to him? I started carrying my phone around with Munford and Sons blaring out to try and drown out the noise- we had also tried everything and I hated hearing him scream, in the end it started to calm him- I still had to walk/stand holding him but at least there wasn't tears. I also second what Ceader said about going for a walk- works a treat to help get then to sleep.
Have a big hug the bad days are horrible and don't worry they will not remember any of the swear words he will have heard to day! (J has heard some choice language when he had days like you describe!) glad H is helping, can you have a relaxing bath while H has him?
11/04/2013 at 19:58
You have my every sympathy! You're not a bad parent for sitting down, sometimes nothing is good enough for them so you may as well sit down or put them down for a while and sit by them if they are going to cry anyway. Hope he's ok now and you have a had a decent break.
11/04/2013 at 20:21
Just sending a huge hug. Just to add to the other advice I'd second putting him in the pram and pushing him back and forth, pop some head phones in if you need but best you can do is keep calm and try to stop yourself getting upset as he will pick up on that. Huge hugs and I hope be settles soon.
11/04/2013 at 21:02
Hope he's settled now Saisi. It's so draining when they have episodes like that x
11/04/2013 at 21:48
Hope you are either asleep, sitting on the sofa with a G&T, in the bath, or lying in a darkened room in silence. Solidarity sista, we've all been there.
11/04/2013 at 22:35
I try and out wail A by putting on music and singing loudly - some strange reason putting the same song on repeat soothes her - ps don't know the lyrics make them up :) as others said sometimes there is nothing you can do to appease them.
12/04/2013 at 11:03
Sorry just got back to this, ended up going to my parents and he calmed right down as there were plenty of arms to hold him and walk around. Had a fairly decent night of sleep too.
Thank you all so much, I feel so much better knowing it's not just my child!! I know that's stupid but sometimes you do feel like that don't you. QC I really like that "thirds" thing, he is usually fairly content so I must be doing a good job
Will remember all your suggestions for next time. The only problem with the pram is that I have to take it up and down stairs so if my back's hurting then it's not a great substitute, but I will definitely try music and I know now it's not the end of the world if I have to leave him wailing for a bit... it's the first time it's really happened, and he doesn't seem to hate me for it!!
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