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14/05/2013 at 09:52
A will not spend 5 seconds by herself. I have to carry her everywhere while trying to do stuff, which is incredibly difficult. She won't sit in her bouncer, lay in her moses, on her playmat or anything. I'm getting to the end of my tether with her as I can't get 2 minutes to get dressed or go to the toilet. She'll cry until i pick her up but even then takes ages to settle back down.
It's stressing me out as I just can't do anything. She slept through from 10.30-7 so i needed to express this morning but it took me over an hour as i had to keep stopping and starting and trying to juggle her and the pump.
I do have a sling but she's not a big fan of it, but even that wouldn't help me when i need to get dressed, have a shower, or express.
14/05/2013 at 09:56
I'd persevere with the sling. I genuinely don't know how people do without them. What one have you got? Maybe you could try a different type?
I used to put E in the bouncer while I showered and sung and pulled faces at her to entertain her. And showered quickly!
14/05/2013 at 10:06
I have a close/caboo but been thinking of getting a ready-made one as it were because i think it stresses her out when i'm fussing with the straps etc. Sometimes she doesn't mind and settles well, but other times it just makes her worse and she gets beside herself. Just putting her down for long enough to get the sling and put it on is enough to set her off.
14/05/2013 at 10:07
For a shower I would just pick a moment whenever she was not crying which was rare but otherwise I would put her in her bouncer and shower anyway. She'd either whinge or the water noise would soothe her until I got out. Tbh I would just have to leave her to cry of I needed to get things ready to go out or get N dressed for example. If she glt hysterical i would pick her up. I understand your frustration. As soon as she was big enough for the sling I would use that. The first few days she would only tolerate half an hour to an hour then she suddenly went longer happier periods in there and now we use it a lot! She is a lot happier now though, it was like a switch at 6 weeks she suddenly chilled out.
14/05/2013 at 10:08
I can't help a lot as H wasn't terrible but I did find as he got older it got easier as he was able to play with his toys on his playmat etc. we bought 2 things which made a massive different to us, a swing and a piano playmat. Only things he'd settle on at first. Past couple of weeks he's started to sit in bouncy chair after hating it for about 10 weeks!
It does get better (although that's no help now)
14/05/2013 at 10:23
Have a look at ring slings - they're the quickest slings to put on.
14/05/2013 at 10:30
She will not come to any harm being somewhere safe, where you can see her whilst you get things done for 5minutes. I know its stressful but you can't hold her 24/7. Have you tried swaddlng her when laying her down? Maybe she feels exposed (IYSWIM) when placed down.
14/05/2013 at 10:31
Things that have worked for me or friends:
A good sling
Vibrating or rocking chair
The Tiny Love mobile over her cot so you can grab a shower
Or as long as she's fed, safe & comfy then just let her cry for a couple of mins so you can go for a wee/shower, it sounds awful but I had to do it occasionally
14/05/2013 at 10:40
I put Henry in his cot with the movement monitor on, I know he's safe, but sometimes I have to just let him cry or else I really wouldn't ever shower/dress.
The sling is also a godsend. I have a caboo and sometimes he can be grouchy but I walk and jig and that usually settles him. Also keep practicing putting it on as iv mastered it in seconds now. I have bought a connecta thinking it would be easier but he REALLY isn't liking it ATM :(
14/05/2013 at 10:49
I have to leave him to cry sometimes. He still gets like it, quite often, at seven-bloody-teen weeks. Usually he is happiest in the morning (is there a time when your A is happiest?) so I pop him in his bouncer and have my shower... usually this is cut short by him starting to fuss. This morning he had a full on meltdown, I came out of the shower and wrapped myself in a towel then held him until he calmed down. The second I put him down again to get dressed, he screamed. So I just left him to it and got ready (I was next to him but not holding him). He was fed, safe and comfy as Hep says, he just wanted to be held.
I have a Beco sling which is good as I only have to put him down to buckle it round my waist, then I hold him and buckle it up round him. (I probably could hold him while buckling round my waist, have never tried.) I stopped using my Moby as it was great while he was in it, but he hated waiting for it to be tied. When he is in the sling I can't stop still or sit down (unless he's fallen asleep), I have to be moving or he starts to fuss. I was on the bus yesterday and he was fine while it was moving, then the driver stopped for ages for no visible reason and A started to fuss so I had to walk around inside the bus!!
He is better now than he was, and will sit on the sofa/Bumbo/rocking chair/playmat for a few minutes, but even then I can't leave him to it as he 'calls' for me and cries if I don't come and play with him. I think the only way I cope is to: a) accept that sometimes I must leave him to cry, if I need to shower or get my bag ready etc and b) let things go... my house hasn't been hoovered in weeks, I've cleaned the bathroom maybe twice since he was born and the kitchen only gets a wipe down occasionally. Oh and c)... THIS TOO SHALL PASS!
Oh and does she get enough sleep? A will only sleep with me (that's a whole 'nother story) so if I try and put him down during the day he'll wake up and be narky. If I let him sleep on me as long as he wants, at least he's usually cheerful when he wakes. I've read that most (not all) small babies need to nap in stretches of at least an hour, so that they've had at least one complete sleep cycle.
14/05/2013 at 11:14
Thanks everyone, some good suggestions. I had forgotten that her bouncer does vibrate but the batteries have run down, so will figure out what batteries it needs and re-stock. I suppose i need to practice more with the sling to get it nice and quick.
Since i posted she has typically been asleep in her bouncer, the little madam making a point i think lol
She's still only young (7 weeks) so i know i shouldn't expect miracles, but its just so hard hearing her cry, but like you all say, if she's fed, changed and safe then i've done all i can and she can wait a few mins.
Its also good to know that its not just me!
14/05/2013 at 11:28
As an alternative can someone come and look after her for an hour or so so you can get ready (and maybe even pop to the shops on your own, luxury!), a friend, or relative, friendly neighbour?
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