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I feel like everyone is so negative!!

Chat < Pregnancy & Birth Clubs < Pregnancy

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  • faithie
    faithie

    23/04/2010 at 09:33

    PM
    I really find at work that everyone is so doom and gloom about having a baby. Its like everything I say is responded to by "Oh that'll all stop when the baby comes". Like I was talking about how I didn't sleep at all the night before because there was a car alarm going off. The response - "If you think that's bad, wait till you have a baby in the house" Or I was laughing at how my husband asks me to pluck his eyebrows. Response - "Oh you won't have time for that carry on when the baby comes". And the other day I was saying at lunch time that I just wish the next 10 weeks would go quickly so I can be on maternity leave. I was absolutely bombarded by women saying "Come back to me 3 weeks after the baby's born and you'll be begging to go back to work" and "Why would you want it to go quickly, you should be savouring every second of freedom, you won't be able to leave the house soon" etc etc. I'm not naive, I know I'll be exhauted and frazzled and my house will be a mess and me and hubby will have no time for each other but it can't be that bad or no one would do it twice. I just feel like saying, I'm sorry you hate being a mum but I'm looking forward to it!!

    Is it really so awful to have a baby?

    [Modified by: faithie on 23 April 2010 14:36:00 ]
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  • diggys_mum
    diggys_mum

    23/04/2010 at 09:46

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    Thank you for making me smile!

    I remember that all so well! My son is now nearly 2 but it's still all fresh in my memory. People will keep saying that but it's best just to take it in the spirit intended - I'm sure it's meant well and people are just trying to be "funny"! Do they really think you've never heard those comments before?!

    My sister- and brother-in-law are visiting at the moment with their 5 week old son and when we saw them first we had horrible flashbacks to how awful we felt at that point. But the next day they seemed more relaxed again and it was nice to see both sides. Yes, it can be that awful (we had 11 weeks of colic...), but if it's really that bad why do I so desperately want another baby? Because it's also totally wonderful and I can't wait to have another new human being in my life. My son is a constant joy and wonder to me but he also drives me up the wall! And I wouldn't have it any other way.

    My favourite comment was always the one about "enjoy your time off!" referring to maternity leave. Ha ha, you're so funny!

    S x

    PS - you pluck your husband's eyebrows...? Interesting...
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  • mummy2sweeties
    mummy2sweeties

    23/04/2010 at 09:49

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    hi hun, congrats on pregnancy xox, dont listen to these silly people trying to ruin this lovely time, I have a two year old and a 9 month, yes my house is full of toys, but it is clean, tidy, yes it is hard at first, but I have time to see my mate at least twice a week, have my eyebrows done once every six weeks, (threading) my kids share a room and sleep 12 to 14 hours a night and dont wake up, I know I am just one person but it is not hard at all. it is something you get use to x x x x
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  • lmt
    lmt

    23/04/2010 at 09:55

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    I know what you mean, it's so bloody irritating!! I had it with dd1 & now i'm having twins it's even worse. Honestly the look of horror on peoples faces when i say i'm having twins & have a 2 yr old is unreal. Infact the woman in the pram shop almost had me in tears. When i asked about pram options for 2 newborns & a toddler it was like i was the first person ever to have this dilema (i'm pretty sure it's not that uncommon!).
    Like you i am not naive & know it's gonna be hard work but it'll be so worth it too.
    I can assure you that it's not as bad as people are telling you, i think it just makes them feel supperior or something when they go on like this. I don't know why people can't just be supportive & possitive?
    You & hubby will be fine.
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  • Katexxxx
    Katexxxx

    23/04/2010 at 09:56

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    Funny you posted this Faithie! I've been thinking the same! Anyone and everyone seems to want to tell me how my life will be over, how everything I enjoy doing will be a thing of the past and how basically hellish it is, etc. etc. It's strange how I see so many mothers out and about with their little babies when I've been told how I will be confined to the house!!

    I know it will be incredibly tough but it annoys me so much how negative people are. TBH I'm so determined now to prove all of the doom and gloomers wrong, they' ve probably done me a favour

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  • BethnAva
    BethnAva

    23/04/2010 at 12:02

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    i know exactly what you mean. it pisses me off when people talk like that.
    and damn you i WILL find time to pluck my eyebrows!
    these days i just don't tell people at work anything.
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  • Potty_Totty
    Potty_Totty

    23/04/2010 at 13:06

    PM
    Just ignore them Fatihie!

    I've had two, its made my life worth living! I love being a mummy, tantrums, stinky sloppy nappies and all!! and NO I am not gagging to get back to work!
    Sounds to me like they are JEALOUS! or just miserable old cows!!

    I still find time to pluck my eyebrows, wax my own bits, wash my hair, paint my toenails, do my ironing/washing/cleaning, put my makeup on. somedays ARE easier than others as sometimes my baby is more demanding than others but at the end of the day ITS WORTH IT! and its your work colleagues problem if they didn't make the most of it when the had theirs (thats if they had any! I mean, maybe it might CRAMP their style! lol)

    As for the sleep thing! I lost more sleep when I was pregnant!! i went into labour at 8am in the morning so had a good nights kip! and my baby sleep through for 7 hours by the age of 10 weeks. (and NO I wasn't 'JUST LUCKY!' because my first baby was the same!) The first 10-12 weeks are hard during the night, but they sleep all the time during the day so its EASY to get stuff done!!

    At least they acknowledge you are pregnant!! I am 14+3 and my whole family know, not one of them have congratulated us! obviously nobody approves of us having another baby already!! MY 2nd is 23 weeks old and perfect and I love her more than life itself! (and my 8 year old son!) so I was actually really happy when I found out I was pregnant again!! I see it as a blessing. All my stupid family can think is "oh poor baby" It drives me mad! its not like I'm going to put the other one in the cupboard lol!!

    Just ignore them! or talk about it even more and REALLY annoy them!! lol
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  • xMrsNoNamex
    xMrsNoNamex

    23/04/2010 at 13:46

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    Arghhhh isnt it annoying? I had this non stop with my first and now its even worse with my second.. i get the whole "oh how will you cope" blah blah blah. It really does drive me up the frickin wall.

    People LOVE to scare monger.

    Been a mummy is great.. of course its testing at time but my god its amazing xx
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  • jellyfishpink
    jellyfishpink

    23/04/2010 at 13:56

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    I am dreading telling certian people I am having a second I can hear them now...going on about me working, about childcare about everything! People love to tell you horror stories about childbirth etc etc! Like MrsNoName says being mummy is amazing!
    xxx
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  • speckle
    speckle

    23/04/2010 at 15:48

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    People like that really annoy me, yes being a mum can be hard work but it is so rewarding. Why try and put a downer on things?
    I have a 3yo, 1yo and a 6 week old and you know what, my house is tidy, i always have my hair nice and make up on and my kids are all content and always smiling! Yep things take alot longer when you have a child or children but you adapt and it makes life so much more exciting. Look forward to being a mummy and dont let these people get you down, it's the best thing that ever happened to me x
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  • LadyTottington
    LadyTottington

    23/04/2010 at 16:02

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    Hey hun, gc , I was never gagging to get back to work either - I adore being a mum, so much better than work!!!!!!

    xxxxxx
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  • sophiearchiephoebe
    sophiearchiephoebe

    24/04/2010 at 10:36

    PM
    oh i hated that too!i had it with my first (who is now 3) and people are trying to do it again this time around. when i had my son i didnt get what all the fuss was about, my house was the tidiest it had ever been as i was off work and was getting all my energy back after 9months of feeling like a big fat fat pregnant lump hehe!i had time to put my makeup on and do my hair and nails etc because babies spend hours and hours asleep anyway!and even if he was awake i could still do all these things sitting next to him entertaining him. people are saying it again this time around that i wont get any time to myself and il be constantly tired but i think being heavily pregnant with a 3year old must surely be worse than having a newborn and a 3year old.i cant wait to see how they interact together and i cant wait to feel healthier and less tired and to be able to enjoy them both.i dont see kids as a pain, i see work as a pain!if i can get away with not going back next time i wont, i love being a mum and being at home!x


    sophie
    archie 3
    and 36+5
    xxxxxxx
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  • MrsB27
    MrsB27

    24/04/2010 at 10:49

    PM
    grrrrrrr.... this make me cross.. and have to confess that yesterday at work i snapped and answered back (naughty me!)

    I asked "if it so horrific then why did you go and have 2 more then?" when she didn't have an answer I told her to stop trying to spoil this very special time for me as i wasn't an idiot and knew that my life was going to be different and surely that was the whole point of having a baby!!!

    My also pregnant but much more reserved colleague gave me a round of applause!
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  • roisine
    roisine

    24/04/2010 at 12:01

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    oh this thread is a goodun,although i find that im giving out to mums and saying enjoy those babies wait till theyre teens (ive a 17yr old)etcbut i have to say thank god i did play with them and give them my time cause when i feel like chucking the eldest one out ill think back to her babyhood.the kids gotcha from day one and youll be fretting over them even they they are grey or bald.motherhood deserves a lot more than a medal.im currently pregnant with my fourth and last im 38 and i pray this baby makes it.ill just giftwrap a set of earplugs for my eldest lolxxxxxx
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  • mama_milf
    mama_milf

    24/04/2010 at 17:16

    PM
    I'm on my 4th baby and people still say it!!! Haha i say erm... they do go actually to bed??! One said "i wonder how you found the time to have another one" and i said "well you know... its only a 5 minute job ...It takes longer to clean the loo"!!! Haha ...Give em something to chew on!!! Xx
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