Pregnancy & Birth Clubs <
25/06/2015 at 22:45
Hi everyone! I'm 23 years old and i just recently found out i am pregnant (about 4 weeks along, super early!) My boyfriend and i decided we were ready for the commitment and responsibility it takes to start our own family. But I just told the news to my mother today and her reaction was "oh my god. Well you have options." She has gone on to mention that I have options at least three more times today! Which has me thinking that she does not approve and wants me to consider getting an abortion! She said she supports whatever I choose, but it certainly doesn't seem that way. Anyone going through the same thing?
26/06/2015 at 08:17
I'm sorry to hear that Shannon marie, that's not supportive. Sounds like she has jumped to the conclusion that it was an accident rather than planned. Maybe you need to sit her down and explain you planned for this baby, that your happy and the only option you ate considering is having this baby. I'm sure she will come around eventually it's just a shock. I hope things get better for you x
26/06/2015 at 11:20
Hello, I agree with butterfly but was wondering if this is your moms first grandchild?
My friend had received this reaction too and it turns out although she was ready to be a mommy, her mom was not ready to be called nanny!
It all turned out fine in the end but it took a while and a few good chats to get to the bottom of it - it wasn't til ' how dare you make me a gran at 44' was yelled at my friend that it clicked lol
Whatever the reason your mom has had this reaction I'm sure she has your best interest at heart and after a while to let your news sink in maybe chat to her again and explain how you and your partner feel about it, she may just need a bit if reassurance like butterfly said.
Best wishes and congrats xx
27/06/2015 at 09:09
Butterfly, thank you for your advice!! Also, busymamma, yes this will be her ffirst grandchild. My mother is about 46 so I'm sure she isn't ready to be a gran just yet.
She spoke to me again today and finally didn't mention the options like before. Today she kept saying she is worried that my boyfriend will only care for himself (like my father did once my sisters and I were born) or that he will leave me and the baby (like her best friends boyfriend did once she had their daughter) I think if my boyfriend talked to her and reassured her that he will not leave us, it will be beneficial to this issue. What do you ladies think?
27/06/2015 at 10:17
It sounds like that's exactly what your mum is worried about due to her past experiences. I guessing she doesn't want you to go through the same thing and manage alone. It might by worth your boyfriend speaking to her. Also as the pregnancy goes on and she sees that he is supporting you her concerns may reduce.
27/06/2015 at 11:50
Yes I think that's a good plan, its every parents worst nightmare for the kids to go thru something they have gone thru and so its natural for her to be worried for you - if your partner steps in and gives her some assurances it will help ( even if it won't remove 100% of her fears ) it will ease them.
Yout partner being consistant and supportive will 'show' her he is committed and over Time this will easeher fears more but unfortunately nothing in life is gaurenteed - all anyone can promise is here and now and your mom has experienced this first hand, so maybe go easy on her while she is getting her head around it all x
Best wishes x
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