Pregnancy & Birth Clubs <
17/09/2017 at 12:24
Hello I'm 14 weeks pregnant and feel completely terrified of everything that could go wrong. Last year we lost our first baby to encephalocele had to pass baby naturally at 13wk+5d it was awful we were heartbroken. We then suffered a miscarriage at the beginning of this year. Now I'm 14 weeks along with our rainbow I'm absolutely terrified. Due to my first baby having encephalocele I have to have a 16 week scan to check on baby if they are doing okay/have no abnormalities. My 12 week scan went perfectly they said that baby looks great and normal they don't have any concerns so far. I know people say don't worry you'll be fine stress is bad for the baby. I know all of this but I'm so scared. Even when I was waiting for my first scan I literally wanted to burst into tears and I feel the same about having to go for another scan. Of course I hope and pray each day and night my baby will be okay in there. But the thought of coming home with bad news looms over me. Ive only seen my midwife once. Due to see her for the second time next month. She asked how I was feeling and I admitted I'm very depressed and terrified she said if I still feel like this I need to contact my dr for anti depressants. I've been on them before way before I feel pregnant but they never really helped me they in fact made me feel awful despite trying different ones. I know some expectant mums take them while pregnant , that's fine but for me I don't want to. I try to express my feelings and fear to my partner and family but they say I'm being stupid (let's hope I am) but I can't get this fear to leave me. I feel like I have no emotional support from anyone because whenever I tell them I'm scared or I'm worried I either get told to shut up. Or that I'm being a drama queen. I understand other ladies/couples have been through far worse than me. But I just feel like I'm going to break down in tears all the time. I don't know what to do or who to turn to for help I sugg. I'm hoping and praying so hard I get happy news at my next scan!
17/09/2017 at 15:28
Hi rainbow17, welcome to MFM and congratulations on your rainbow baby. We promise you, you're not alone in how you're feeling. We thought you might want to check out our Birth Clubs - you can find and meet other women due the same time as you - we're sure some of them know how you're feeling...
18/09/2017 at 20:15
Hi Rainbow17. So sorry for your losses and that you're feeling this way. It is very sad that your family are not giving you the support you deserve at this time. Of course your fears and worries are valid, you are not being stupid at all.
I know you say you do not wish to take anti-depressants but it is still a good idea to visit the doctor. They may be able to refer you for talking therapy.
Good luck for your 16 week scan and I hope things get easier for you soon x
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