Pregnancy & Birth Clubs <
19/11/2013 at 18:02
My mum popped in today, to essentially have a go at us.
Back story - Sunday we had a chat about our friends whose parents were stood outside their home waiting on them returning from hospital ( this didn't end well as they were planning some family time), we used this as an example to raise the topic and at the time she seemed fine... Although did mention that even if we couldn't see her we would hear her (which seems a bit odd).
Fast forward to today....
I apparently don't know how much I have hurt her, there were also mentions that we were joking around and this was "very Jeremy Kyle" according to her new partner ( to say I am insulted by this is an understatement) She left soon after her rant and tbh I am more than a bit bemused. I've spent the afternoon in tears and when I text to apologise and explain I didn't mean to hurt her (tho still not sure what I have done) she was just very cold, saying she didn't want to talk. Not really sure what to do next if anything, what happens now if I go into labour??? Do I tell her?? Do I try and contact her again tomo? The stress!!!
don't know the reason for posting - other than a bit of catharsis :-(
19/11/2013 at 18:11
Ah parents! that sounds really upsetting and a stress you don't need judging by your ticker! Lucky with mine but it's H's we have issues with, no advice but I'd be tempted to just let her get in touch with you now. She's clearly misinterpreted the situation and you've tried to apologise so I'd leave her be for now until she realises. As my granny used to say "she'll come round without water" xx
19/11/2013 at 18:36
That is a great saying! :-) thank you x
19/11/2013 at 19:46
Oh I totally know how you feel. My parents turned up at the maternity while I was in labour, wanted to come in and see me! I told the MW no way. They did however get in when A was about 30 min old. I was raging.
I'm sure she'll realise she's blown it out of proportion and come round in a day or so.
19/11/2013 at 20:06
19/11/2013 at 20:13
I'm sure she'll come round but stand your ground about wanting time to yourselves.
H's mum came down when B was born and stayed at our house (she lives two hours away). The plan was for her to stay at ours and look after W while I was in hospital as was having a c section so knew I'd be in a few days.
But I went into labour 3days early so she was still at work. She only came down the day before I came out of hospital so still wanted to stay a few days even though I was coming home. h knew I didn't want that but she guilt tripped him and he in turn made me feel bad so she ended up staying. She eventually left when B was a week old, and only then because I was making it obvious I was miserable and wanted time alone. I still am upset about the fact we missed out on time together as a family in those first few days at home.
Whatever you do, try to discuss with your h in advance what you want to do about visitors and stand your ground. Even if family get upset about it they'll get over it in time but you won't get the time back if you miss out on it.
I hope your mum sees sense soon but in the mean time try not to give yourself any stress x
19/11/2013 at 20:24
Thanks JT - I'm so rubbish at doing "nothing" but feels this is the only way at the mo.
Have also started looking into nursery provision again (she had offered to do 2. Days) but tbh this has brought home the fact that the stress of that will outweigh any benefits.
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