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29/07/2013 at 17:09
How old was your baby when they did this and what was your approach?
I believe by now it's suggested I should be trying it - S is 9 weeks. In the morning I put him in his chair either as soon as he's nodded off or if he's on the verge of (after a feed) and he does go to sleep even if he isn't quite there. At night though, he always falls into his deep sleep from a feed, we are downstairs and I bring him up with me an hour or so later so when he goes in his crib he's already in a deep sleep.
The closest we've got I think was the other night where we had a nightmare getting him to sleep after being out all day, he'd nod off, wake 5 mins later, be sick, etc. etc. and woke as soon as I put him down, I was obviously on the verge of jumping out the bedroom window, just to get some rest, so H suggested leaving him in his crib and sat with him whilst Sam sucked his finger and I zonked out next to them. It took 30 minutes apparently but he went to sleep and remained so for 5 hours - this isn't self settling though is it? Does it count if he borrowed a body part?!
I'm fine the way things are but I guess a bit worried I might be missing a boat or something age wise? What worked for you, and what ages were your LOs?
29/07/2013 at 17:16
Hmm. Mine zonked from a feed ALL the time so it was about 6m when we did self settling (as he stopped being so drowsy at that time)
29/07/2013 at 18:08
We used the Baby Whisperer which advocates a wind down routine which you use every time you settle them down for a sleep so they know what to expect.
We also used self settling technique of shhh-pat from about 8 weeks - see www.babywhispererforums.com/index.php
It seemed to work for us and we had to settle her less and less as we did it, and now (at 12 weeks) she settles on her own within 5 mins or so of being put down Sometimes I just need to lay my hand on her back (she is a tummy sleeper), or on her tummy if she is in her car seat and that is enough to help her settle.
29/07/2013 at 18:12
I started at 12weeks and did a sort of baby whisperer technique too. He was about 16weeks when he began reliably doing it and has been in a fab routine ever since.
29/07/2013 at 18:45
I'll be watching this with interest. A has absolutely no ability to self settle and cries the second i put her down awake or sleepy and only gets more worked up until i pick her up. She also only usually settles when sucking my finger (she won't take a dummy), so i feel your pain!
29/07/2013 at 18:51
Ooh this baby whispering sounds good, thank you! Did you use a book? There seems to be a few on amazon?
Nenas - sorry A is being such a little scamp, fx some whispering works for you too. Are you struggling to get her down at night even when asleep? Hope it eases soon x
29/07/2013 at 18:56
Yep I have used the book , in fact I now have 2 of her books - the best one to start with is this one.
29/07/2013 at 18:58
I can lay her down asleep (just) but she's been waking after 1.5-2 hours, sometimes less, and I know she's not hungry so try settling her, but she gets so worked up that i usually end up feeding her (she just comforts) and we go through the same cycle!
29/07/2013 at 19:01
We also have v rare occurrences of self settling at 6 months. He feeds to sleep mainly or will sometime nap next to someone but will never settle in his basket or cot!
29/07/2013 at 19:02
Fab, thanks Alocin, have ordered it!
29/07/2013 at 19:25
Just to say all babies are different and they haven't read the books! Mine didn't self settle til he was over 1yo and then it didn't last, now at nearly 4yo he reliably self settles.
If I had a baby that could ss then I would definitely encourage it but so many can't and need to feed to sleep, be held, rocked etc that I was happy to do what he needed me to to help him. It's only a short time they're that small so don't fret they 'should' be doing anything.
29/07/2013 at 19:37
E can't self settle properly now at 14.5 months. Sometimes she'll settle herself back to sleep in the night (usually), but can't self settle at bedtime or for naps. I think that's pretty normal tbh (sorry!) without some sort of sleep training (ie baby whisperer or the no cry sleep solution). Some do it from tiny, some need help.
29/07/2013 at 20:17
Thanks both. I won't get in a tizzy if he won't, and also won't try and change the feeding to sleep business at night, as it's working for him and more fool me to change what works! Plus, it's rather lovely :) It will be interesting to read some tips, but I'm completely led by him (like he'd have it any other way ha ha!) so will see how it goes. Glad your Lo's are now settled - I had a feeling that it would be the minority that do it from small, the nhs website have a couple of sentences on it that they send in weekly emails - making it sound so simple, pah!
29/07/2013 at 22:57
William has been self settling for a few weeks now. I didn't make a consious descision to do it, it just kind of happened. We take him to the bed room at bedtime and give him his bedtime feed. We put him down awake and he conks out on his own. He sometimes goes over straight away, other nights he lies and chats to his mobile for ages and then drifts off. I hope you have an easy time of it when you start! :-)
30/07/2013 at 09:15
Erm, we're teaching Miss CV to self settle this week and she's almost 4...!
But as far as I'm concerned, if it's not broke, don't fix it. Bedtime for us for years has consisted of a story and a cuddle / chat and then we'd stay with her until she'd fall asleep, which didnt usually take more than 5-10 minutes. We had a couple of tough nights getting her settled recently where she was hyped up after long days out in the sun so I decided that now was the time. She understands that it's time she learned to go to sleep on her own and there's no tears or trauma.
30/07/2013 at 10:55
E self settled right from newborn, it's something I've always encouraged but the older she gets, the more hit and miss it becomes with teething, jabs, growth spurts, development leaps, illness, weaning upsets, moving to own room etc.. In some ways, it's harder like this, because say just now, she's a poorly tummy and is teething, really struggling to self settle but because she's not used to it, me holding and cuddling her to sleep isn't an option and she just screams and screams, i'm just sitting listening to her cry, she won't be shhh'd she wont be rocked or sang to or stroked - so IMO a bit of both self settling when they can and cuddling when they can't would work much much better.
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