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13/08/2014 at 13:53
So I only started yesterday & it seemed to go ok (only the odd accident) but in hindsight I realised that actually she still only went when she usually does before her nap & before bed. Today she didn't even do that & went in her pull up that I put her in to nap. I obviously sat her on the loo to go before I put her down but she was more interested in reading then going.
I'm now worried that I've started before she's ready. She's 30 months (1 of the main reasons I thought she'd be ready) & is happy to sit on the toilet & has been pretty good at going before a nap & bedtime but has never once said that she needs to do a wee or a poo. I thought that once she was in knickers that she'd be able to feel that she was wet but today she sat & did a big wee in her knickers & didn't even notice.
I'm feeling very deflated by the whole thing. I didn't expect it to happen overnight but I guess I was expecting her to get it & have an understanding of it as she's so articulate of everything. I am gonna keep it up but I fear she's not ready & may be awhile of being to go when she needs to rather than me co-indicently getting her to sit on the toilet at the right time.
Any advice or experience would be fab, thanks x
13/08/2014 at 14:07
13/08/2014 at 14:08
13/08/2014 at 14:16
To be honest, I'd probably leave it for now and try again another time. Children are all different and get it at different ages, Joshua was very early to train but Jacob was a lot later and is still in nappies at night, my niece was a lot like isobelle and was a later trainer too but once she got it it was almost instant. It's also common for them to regress slightly when a new baby comes as it's a big change to get used to. I'd leave it for now and try again once baby is here and you are all settled. We must catch up soon as well, I need to see your lovely bump before it turns into a baby! Will message you.
13/08/2014 at 14:33
This sounds exactly like W. I felt under pressure that lots of children younger than her at play groups were already out of nappies, she was really early at walking, crawling etc, had a great understanding of instructions etc. but she didn't really have much interest in potty training. She would poo in her nappy and I would ask if she had done a poo or if she wanted me to change her nappy and she would say no.
I decided to give her a go in knickers as I hoped feeling wet would make her soon start sitting on the potty. I spent the day quickly sticking the potty under her when she started to wee, and later in the day she sat on the floor playing, did a wee, and just carried on playing sitting in the wee.
I decided she clearly wasn't ready and I just would have to wait a while. I was disappointed but knew there was no point continuing.
About 6 weeks later she decided to take her bappy off and refused to put it back on. I then spent a couple of days in the house asking her every 15 mins or so to sit on the potty. I think we maybe had one accident . Then after that no more. She's never had an accident outside. She has a potty in her room and wears pull ups in bed at night but hasn't done anything in the pull up for a couple of weeks, she will get out of bed, pull her knickers down, do a wee or poo, wipe herself and get back in bed. It was literally like a switch was flicked in her brain.
I would definitely recommend leaving it a while and trying again in a few weeks. It was a stage I had dreaded, I didn't want to have to deal with weeks of accidents everywhere and loads of accidents while out of the house, but it's been so easy, and I think it's because I waited until she wanted to do it.
There's no hurry, I know it feels like once they turn two you're under pressure to do it and people always ask you about it, but there's a huge gap in the age they start walking or get a tooth, why would this be any different.
13/08/2014 at 14:44
Thanks ladies. I'm staying home the next few days so we'll see what happens. But I feel better as all my friends with children the same age have dry children & have done for awhile. Although, bizarrely, it hasn't bothered me with anything else. I also really wanted to do it before the baby arrives but I guess if she's not ready then she's not ready.
Thanks ladies, pregnancy hormones probably don't help either!!
13/08/2014 at 15:00
My advice? Stick with it a few more days. As you know, we started potty training F 2.5 weeks ago. We originally started back in June but after 3 days I was pulling my hair out so I decided to wait until after our holiday.
So, a few weeks ago I decided to try again. The first 2 days were quite hard going. He'd literally just stand there and wee on the floor with no real emotion one way or the other about it. I felt like all I did those 2 days were clean the floor. The third day started off similar but by the afternoon, he was showing some progress. He actually went and sat on the potty 2/3 times, of his own accord, and did a couple of wees and even a poo. I couldn't believe it.
A few people told me that if he hasn't grasped it after a couple of days then I should stop but I believe this is nonsense. I think it takes a lot longer for them to understand fully, afterall they have spent 2/3 years in nappies being able to go to the toilet as and when they need to so do undo this surely takes longer than 2 days.
It wasn't until day 6 that I saw more wees on the potty than on the floor - I think he had one accident that day and he was either going and sitting on it himself or when I asked him to.
Days 8 and 9 he was staying at my mums and did really well. Only one little accident and that was mainly a dribble in his pants.
We're now on day 19. He rarely tells me he needs to go to be honest. He'll either take himself over to his potty or I'll ask him to go and sit on it if I think it's been a while since he went. I do have to bribe him with watching his favourite programmes, etc but that's a small price to pay IMO. We also have a sticker reward chart and I was giving him a smartie each time he had a wee/poo on the potty. Now he's not even that fussed with a reward so I think we're ready to phase that out.
He has been dry a couple of times over night, although still in a nappy or pull up for bed, and the first thing he does when he wakes is to actually say he wants a wee. The only time of the day he asks!
I would say give it a week before you make a decision as to whether or not she's ready x
13/08/2014 at 15:12
Thanks WG. That's useful to know. It's the fact that she hasn't once gone in there on her own accord & doesn't even notice that she's done it. I've got a sticker chart & lots of stickers which she's very excited about but that hasn't helped things. We're supposed to be going to a wedding reception on friday night, I don't want to put her back in a nappy for it & I also don't want it to be stressful which is why I said the Friday deadline if she hasn't initiated anything by herself. I'm then home all week next week till Thursday when we're back home with family (a 3 hour drive) for the bank holiday weekend. There just doesn't seem to be a good time to do it. Also she's refused to nap today & I feel really tired (keep forgetting to take my iron tablets & having my h away yesterday didn't help).
13/08/2014 at 15:21
It's hard work that's for sure and it feels even more so when pregnant (not that I know what it's like when not pregnant!)
13/08/2014 at 16:34
tbh i think leave it for now, thats not to say dont have the potty before naps like you were doing, but i think if shes not telling you and if theres a lot of accidents then shes not ready and it can take a while for them to get it, whereas if you leave it a few weeks and try again then it should just be a doddle (well kind of, ykwim)
basically with isaac, he refused point blank to sit on the potty, but would always tell us, even in a nappy which was vvv frustrating. he then just decided he would actually sit on it and is now dry day and night almost instantly. so i think with her not realising then id leave it a few weeks, have the potty out and then after each nappy change tell her shes done a wee/poo, if she goes to the loo with you then tell her you are having a wee etc (lucas loved announcing what i was doing particularly in supermarket toilets )
o and also we had 'pirate pete uses the potty' which isaac loved and used to sit on the potty reading i think theres a girls one too.
13/08/2014 at 17:36
Thanks RF, that's the conclusion I think I'm coming to. Will give it 1 more day to see if we have any progress & if not will wait till I go on mat leave in just over a month & try again then. Was thinking a book might be a good idea but as we're using the toilet & not a potty I'm not sure if any are relevant.
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