Pregnancy & Birth Clubs <
04/08/2014 at 09:37
I am so so so nervous about my scan on Friday. I will be just shy of 12 weeks. I've had 2 already, one at 6+4 and one two weeks later which put me at 8+5.
Why am I so scared that I will get to Friday and they tell me its all over? I know the risk of MC decreases hugely after seeing at HB at 8/9 weeks. I know this is the furthest I have ever got. I know that logically there is no reason why this baby wont be alive anymore. But I am so scared.
Please help me. I'm overanalysing everything. I panic when I don't feel sick, even though I had over 2 weeks of solid seasickness between 7 and 9 weeks. I worry that my boobs don't hurt as much any more, even though I have gone up a cup size and cant lie on them AND get random stabby pains through them. I worry when I stay up later than 10pm cos i'm obviously not as tired any more. EVEN THOUGH I am just over 11 weeks and generally people do start feeling better now.
I cant relax.
I think it might be because we plan to tell H's children after the scan Friday. there is a lot resting on it, now we've seen baby wriggling about it feels so much more to lose.
04/08/2014 at 09:44
I can totally understand why you feel like this. I am terrible (see my panicky post over the weekend!) and I have no history of any previous complications, so if I'm like I am I can totally understand why you must be feeling even worse. I would take comfort from the positive scans that you have already had and try and focus on Friday and that you will see your wriggling little baby. The advice given to me over the weekend was to focus on small milestones, which I have tried to do. Is there anything you can do to try and take your mind of it?
Sorry for pretty rubbish advice, but just want to let you know that you are completely normal to be feeling like this, and big hugs for Friday, will be thinking of you x
04/08/2014 at 09:49
Its been easier up 'til now cos I was using small milestone, but this is the big one now and there's nothing else in between now and then.
I have work all week which will be busy and I am getting my hair done tomorrow but apart from that there's not much else!
04/08/2014 at 09:54
04/08/2014 at 09:56
04/08/2014 at 10:08
Thanks Imp x I'm just so worried. And I am scared that by being overly worried I will somehow make my fear come true. But Im scared to be too positive in case it all comes crashing down. I wasn't this nervous before the other ones. I still have 4 days to go.
04/08/2014 at 10:18
Your scan is momentous especially if the milestone brings negative memories back to the surface. I'm not the best person to advise you as I was also a nervous wreck but just remind yourself that every pregnancy is different.
Take each day as it comes and try and stay occupied as much as you can...throwing yourself into work might help. It did with me anyway....
04/08/2014 at 11:19
I can't give you any advice Rod but sending lots of weirdy internet vibes for you xx
04/08/2014 at 11:22
Very normal to worry. I can't add much to help you relax as you know the figures already, I think its just natural to worry. Hugs and I hope that the week goes as quickly as it can for you xx
04/08/2014 at 11:37
04/08/2014 at 11:56
04/08/2014 at 12:04
Perfectly normal, I felt massive anxiety before my 12 week scan an do had not been through anything like you have previously. Will be thinking of you and sending massive vibes on Friday!
04/08/2014 at 12:48
It's normal I had bad news at a 12 week scan and even with this pregnancy (ie 4 pregnancies later!) on the gestational date we got the bad news, the date of the scan, the gestational age he was when he died I have huge fears. This baby's edd is his birthday (day he died basically) and I was absolutely beside myself regarding that.
This time we basically were very grim about things I suppose, we said at the time of the bfp if there was similar issues then we would immediately terminate rather than having lots of investigations again. So it felt better we had a plan iyswim (I know your situation is different), I had a few early scans but none made me feel better as I knew 12 and 20 were the biggies.
I messed up at my 12 week scan as h was away and he asked sol to come with me, but she was so so giddy, despite knowing our history she was so excited about going to a scan (not her fault, for others it is exciting), anyway I ended up saying I wanted to go on my own, as I couldn't deal with the fall out if it all went wrong iyswim, so I turned up, it was Williams sonographer and the same room so I was hysterical and cried throughout. She was really nice but I'd have preferred someone to come with me but in my head I was just remembering back to how it was when it all went wrong and the state I was in and I could imagine just sitting comforting sil.
So h took annual leave at the other scans.
Fingers xd all is well and nice low risk results, you are doing the right thing busying yourself over the next few days too. Not sure if it would help you but they offered me an iPod and ear phones at my 20 week scan but I declined but I know a few people who have used them just to take their minds of things whilst they do the initial measurements.
04/08/2014 at 13:05
Thanks everyone. This isn't even the Nuchal, that's not for another 2 weeks, its my last EPU scan.
I'm just trying not to think about it too much.
04/08/2014 at 13:11
It's completely normal when you've been through what you have. At all my scans this time I was a nervous wreck. Just get through each day one at a time. I tried to distract myself but nothing really worked. Hugs xxxx
04/08/2014 at 14:12
No advice but pregnancy can be the most terrifying thing.
big hugs and great advice above.
04/08/2014 at 15:26
I have no helpful advice to offer, but I can't blame you for worrying. Scans are scary even when you have no history of loss so I cant imagine how you are feeling. All you can do is try and distract yourself and as others have said take it one day at a time. I hope the time goes quickly and that all is well x
04/08/2014 at 16:56
Hope you have got some comfort from this thread Rod & everything is well at your scan.
I've experienced anxiety throughout this pregnancy & found lazy daisy classes really gd for relaxation techniques - even If I'm just finding it hard to get to sleep.
I've also gone for reflexology Every couple of weeks & have had a couple of pregnancy massages - I really recommend these once your past the 12 weeks to help you relax.
I don't think the fear will ever leave you, pregnancy is scary & it's such a responsibility, so it's about finding ways to cope with it - I hope that makes sense & doesn't upset you further.
And be honest with your consultant from the start. Because my placenta was low until 34 weeks I never spoke about my issues & at 35 wks I had a meltdown with the registrar. I was back with consultant today & I'm getting an urgent psychiatrist app before birth / planned c-section. I wish I hadn't left it so long to say what I've been feeling.
04/08/2014 at 17:35
Yep completely normal, I had a mmc which was discovered at 12 week, so next pregnancy I worried about early scan, 12 week, 20 week...then went on to have growth scans and placental position scans and they were weekly towards the end, monitoring was constant some weeks and I still worried that they might find something wrong.
some people sail through pregnancy with no complications and see the scans as just an opportunity to see baby (this was me first pregnancy) but unfortunately others know that things aren't necessarily straightforward and the scans are medical procedures where problems can potentially be diagnosed. I kept getting told "this is a new pregnancy, enjoy it" but that's not easily done when you have experienced that things can go wrong
Good luck for Friday, hope this week flies by and everything goes well. Look forward to reading your update when you tell us all is ok and you were worrying about nothing xxx
04/08/2014 at 18:47
Totally normal sweetie xxx hugs xxxx
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