Toddlers & Older Children <
07/03/2010 at 11:58
Hi all im exspicting my second daugther on the 24th of april and im worryed how my 14month old daugther kyra will react. She is very good at understanding things and a quick learner she loves my bump and nos that when i say weres mummys baby she will point to my belly and kisses it. Ive been telling her that she is a big girl and that she will be a big sister but i dnt no what else i could do.
Any ideas would be helpful. xx
07/03/2010 at 14:34
I don't know that there's a lot you can do other than talking about baby.As much as at 14 months they have a good understanding of some things,they're not going to get their baby was in Mummy's tummy,now it's here.
My last three babies are now 3,nearly two and 9 months.Arwen was 15 months when Matilda was born,Matilda was then 14 months when Merlin was born.There's been very little jealousy.We'd done with bottles and raggies and things that needed to be given up so they were forgotten about by the time baby got here.Also make sure you have a routine in place for your older child,I had mine taped to the fridge,so that while you're in hospital and after you get home,if someone else is helping out it's kept to so there's as little disruption as possible.
All you can do is be reassuring if there are a few tears if you can't do what Kyra needs right now.If there's someone that can hold baby while you hold Kyra that's helpful.Always include Kyra in a feed if she wants to come sit with you.Have books,cbeebies,whatever she likes ready so it's time spent with her too.Also does she have a dolly that could be her baby,you could play feed the baby,change the baby,she's very young still but that may help,even before you have the baby.
At this age I found a few tears,Arwen used to swipe Matilda's sheet cos it used to be hers,so I gave her one of her own,and she wasn't interested any more.Any of those wobbly moments only lasted less than two weeks,the baby quickly became part of the toddler's normal life.As far as possible try to get baby to fit into your life,have baby in a little chair while you play,or a sling,or he/she'll sleep in the pram while you're in the park.There will be plenty of quiet times when Kyra's napping or evenings and night feeds for those new Mummy/new baby quiet times together,which are important too.
I know it's a big worry ,especially when your toddler is just a baby herself,but it will be just fine.I found the younger my toddler's been,the quicker and easier they've got used to the new baby.
Good luck and enjoy it
07/03/2010 at 20:29
Just wanted to say as usual Jo is right on the money there,I totally agree! Plenty of re-assurance for Kyra and cuddles,and the doll idea I'm sure will work a treat!
We didn't have too much jealousy(17mths betwwen ours) however Tom ignored me for a week when I came out of hospital,my fella was worried when he went back to work after paternity leave,but the way I saw it was he'd get on with me or not!!! Sounds harsh but as I didn't panic and make a fuss he settled really quickly. There are a few hairy moments in first 2 weeks but as Jo has said,all returns to calm soon enough x
09/03/2010 at 01:09
Thank you soo much you have really helped i didnt think of the doll idea as she dose have a baby and loves feeding her and that sourt of stuff. And she wasnt ever in to dummies or her blankets she was just atached to her bottle witch we have just over come as she will now drink out of a cup with a straw witch is alot better. I dont feel so worryed now thanks xx
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