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OT- urgent advice pls girls

Chat < Toddlers & Older Children < Toddler

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  • Lambchop80
    Lambchop80

    05/07/2010 at 08:40

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    As I'm sure you know I'm currently going thru a miscarriage, it's a horrid experience and I daren't leave the house at the moment as the bleeding is extreme!

    Anyway one of my friends has offered to come see me, which is nice except she has a newborn baby & quite frankly I'm not sure I'm in a good enough headspace to handle seeing a newborn baby. But how do I tell her not to come? Another of our joint friends visited yesterday so I can't say I'm not having visitors but I don't want to sound mean or offend her by telling her I don't want to see her adorable baby girl?

    What do I do? Let her come & see how I handle it? Today is the first day I haven't cried and I don't want to start again but I'm afraid seeing this baby will set me back.
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  • basscl
    basscl

    05/07/2010 at 08:46

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    How about saying you're having a down day and struggling with little babes today (say you saw one on TV and it set you off). I'm sure she'd understand. Make plans for another day though at the same time as you cancel. That way your friend will know that you still want her support (if she doubts it in any way while she's hormonal or fragile due to lack of sleep if it's a really new baby).

    Big hugs to you hun.
    {{{{{{{{}}}}}}}}}
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  • -kia-
    -kia-

    05/07/2010 at 09:03

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    Sorry to hear about your mc

    I'd just be honest with her and tell her you will find it hard to handle being around a newborn - if she's a true friend she'll understand. My cousin was due a couple of months after me but sadly she has m/c and I've told her that I'll totally understand if next time she's visiting she doesn't want to be around me and/or baby depending on when she visits as I'd totally get where she's coming from (I fuond it hard to make the decision to see a friend with a 6 month old a couple of months after my mc).

    hugs

    xx
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  • linzimc88
    linzimc88

    05/07/2010 at 09:39

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    Hi hun, not sure if you will have already resolved this but just wanted to echo what the others have said, I'm absolutely sure any good friend would understand and not take any offence. it must be a horrendous thing to be going through, and I'm sure she'll want to do whats best by you, so don't feel bad by asking her not to come.

    xxx
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  • LadyTottington
    LadyTottington

    05/07/2010 at 09:57

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    Oh hun, sorry you're going through this - I expect your decision is made now - but I would have just said your mum/sister/someone she doesn't know is coming round today - so could you put her off till another time.

    Hope you're ok xxxx
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