Getting Pregnant <
Trying to conceive
11/12/2013 at 01:22
hey everyone im new to this site haven't tried anything like this before so i thought i would give it a shot.
im 21yrs old me and my partner have been trying for 7 months, unfortunately my cycle started this morning was devastated. Each month it gets me more down, tried not to think about it, we have tried having fun and we gave up on officially trying 3 months ago, but its still at the back of my mind each month.
i have tried folic acid, vitamin e and c, flax seed and evening primrose oil as well, even tried ovulation kits, nothing has worked so far, is there anything else out there that has proven to help?
please help please
11/12/2013 at 08:08
I have also been ttc since June and still nothing! I think every one says the key is to relax and not to worry about it but that is impossible. I would stick with doing ovulation tests if you can as I didn't do them last month thinking I would take the relaxed approach and I just couldn't relax as I didn't know exactly when I had ovulated and therefore didn't really know where I was in my cycle, so I shall be back to doing them this month. I am currently CD5, so we are pretty close. I don't mind being your ttc buddy to help you along the way
After I came off Micogynon in May my cycles were all over the place and were getting longer and longer so I went to the docs and I had a scan to rule out PCOS which luckily came back negative.
I am 27 and my parter is 34 and it is our first we are ttc. My partner is going to do a home testing male fertility test tonight to rule that out and then if that comes back as positive then we know it's just a matter of waiting and being patient. We are both taking Pregnacare vitamins, just to get our bodies in the best possible shape as my OH isn't the best at eating fruit and veg etc.
11/12/2013 at 11:35
thanks for ur reply i really appreciate it alot, where do u get the home testing kits for male? same thing with my cylce, ive never been on the pill and my cylces r ether 28 days or 32 days long so i dont know if thats a bad thing or means that there is something wrong, ive tried the relax approach its so hard to sit there and try not to think about it, yer i might give the kit another go ive only used it twice, thinking about going for a scan to get the all clear, thanks would like to be ttc buddies, keep me updated with how u go.
also what sort of vitamins can men take to help fertility ?
yer been trying to eat healthy and exercise more and drink more water, fingures crossed for both of us
sorry this is all new for me (the site advice)
11/12/2013 at 12:53
No problem at all....the ladies on here are lovely and very welcoming and will help you as much as they can! I have found it a big help to talk to people in a similar situation to me. I got the male fertility test from Boots and it was £29.99...will be worth every penny just for piece of mind. Ah 28 days is the 'norm' and things such as being stressed or unwell can affect the length of you cycles so I don't think you have anything to worry about regards the length of your cycles.
I buy my ovulation test strips off amazon as they are really cheap....I paid £7.90 for 50 strips and they work!! If you are doing them month in month out it is just too expensive to be buying dearer ones. It is basically two lines and the test line has to be same or darker colour to the control line. You do doubt yourself as to whether or not it is the same colour etc but I have always had a positive test in a month
If I am honest I don't really know what vitmins are good for a mans fertility.....my OH takes the Pregnacare Wellman tablets. It's only the last couple of weeks that I thought it could possibly be my OH's fertility so haven't really looked in to things for him to take. I thought it was all down to me as I had some Lletz treatment done two years ago for abnormal cancerous cells so I kinda put the blame down to that. I do need to ring the hospital actually as when I was there last month she made a comment saying it could take me longer because of the treatment I had done and I want to get a better answer than that really.
When I went to my Dr she said that I should probably try to lose a bit of weight....I'm by no means big (size 14) but she said it could possibly help so I am currently following SW and have lost 9lb so far.
I would definitely pay a visit to your Dr and just ask for their advice....they may not send you for any scans or anything yet as they do normally say to give it at least 12 months...I think I dropped on and was very lucky to be sent for one actually. It is worth a go though, they can only say yes or no, nothing to lose.
11/12/2013 at 13:47
Stress hormones are a very powerful contraceptive. It really is true that you MUST try to stop thinking about it, because your hormone levels will rise and hinder conception. I have conceived twice in my 40's, and I believe that I helped by staying relaxed and 'let's see what happens' about it. In fact, having something other to think about, like plans for a holiday or some other plan on the horizon that a baby will screw up, will probably help it along too!
It's also important to make love ONLY every few days - throughout your cycle (even when you are on your period) - rather than every day. The sperm need time to mature before you have sex, and 2-3 days is recommended. I know I conceived both my babies towards the end of my period, rather than in those few recommended days around a week later.
Throw away any thermometers and charts. Make love when you feel like it, and don't focus on getting pregnant. It will happen. Trying for anything up to a year is normal. Many people have a first child by IVF and then conceive naturally afterwards, because they are no longer stressing about having a baby.
11/12/2013 at 14:34
11/12/2013 at 15:30
I must admit I am not somebody who stresses about it and I don't do all the charting and temperatures etc as I would find that too much hard work! I only started using ovulation tests because when I came off the pill my cycles were over 40 days long and I didn't have a clue if I was ovulating and when I was ovulating, so it was piece of mind and I just like to do them to know where I am in my cycle. We also don't DTD every day as we had one month doing it every other day and it got too much for me and really was like a chore so we do it as and when we feel like it but do try to do it every other day in my fertile window.
I also know that there is only a 25% chance each month for a 'normal healthy couple' to conceive, which is very low in my eyes. I know 7 months is nothing compared to how long it takes some couples but I just honestly didn't expect it to take this long personally. We have done all the tests we needed to do to check we are both healthy and able to conceive and I am now happy that all tests have come back ok...I will now be able to relax and enjoy the trying process x
11/12/2013 at 15:59
12/12/2013 at 02:36
thanks everyone for the lovely comments and great advice, it means alot to know there is people out there in the same boat as i am and are willing to help in anyway they can.
reasons its alot harder for me right now and making me stress even more is that my younger brother and his OH have been together for 6 months and have been trying for a baby for only 2 months and she is now 12 weeks, i was devastated but happy for them, as its been 7 months for me and my OH.
but i know shouldn't let it get to me it will happen sooner or later.
i do admit i stress a lot about it i worry there is things wrong with me or if something im doing is wrong, my OH worries its him, but atm he is more positive then i am, ive gotta follow the path he is on, ive gotta stop worrying and try to be positive.
i wanna thank you ladies for your help has given me much more insite too what i should be doing rather then stressing and worrying about it all.
also ive herd making love during ur cycle can also be a way of conceving? i thought it would be abit messy? or weird? never tried it, does it work?
12/12/2013 at 08:21
I am no expert but on the things I have read about conceiving it can only happen when you ovulate...sperm can live for up to 7 days while waiting for the egg to be released but I honestly don't think you would conceive from dtd while af is with you, unless you ovulate very early after af?!? Do you know what cycle date you generally ovulate?
It is a personal preference to yourself but for me personally I have tried and do not like to dtd during my cycle....it is very messy and I just don't feel comfortable my OH having to see that.
12/12/2013 at 14:58
Ladies you have my sympathies, trying to conceive when you have gone beyond those inital few months of fun trying can become very frustrating and stressful. But I don't believe stressing over ttc can hinder conceiving and find the 'just relax and it will happen' comments very patronising and they usally come from those who have no experience of the heartache long-term ttc can be.
Monitoring ovulation using the kits can help thou, as even if you may have a 28 day cycle you may not necessarily ovulate on day 14 as most fertility Apps will suggest. I know quite a few people on here in the past who had cycles of 30+days and only found they were ovulating around day20, so they were mis-timing based on Apps and fell pregnant quickly once monitoring. If you don't have success with the cheap kits picking up ovulation (I didn't!) then I would reccomend the clearblue fertility monitor if you have any spare cash after christmas - look on ebay though!
But as twice&counting said regular sex every 2-3days is best to keep his swimmers fresh and should cover ovulation whenever it happens.
AngWass, how did you get on with the semen analysis kit?? I certainly wish they'd been around a few years ago, it would have saved a lot of heartache for us!!
Best of luck to you both and keep your chins up, you may get Xmas or New Year surprise BFPs! If not go and speak to your GPs after 12months and get checked out properly! xxx
12/12/2013 at 21:14
AngWass2 roughly day 9 or 12 of my cycle but the ovulation kits are so confusing the lines ether go to dark or dont come up at all might have to get the better ones i think, it will both happen for us we just have to hang in there..... thanks for your support much appreciated ang
Vickster77b i hope it will happen for u soon vick, thanks for commenting i am thankful, been trying the kits sometimes doesnt even work so ill have to get a better kits see if they work, might still get checked by gp for my own personal mind, yer tried the whole calender fertile thing haha everyone does i guess doesnt work ether cause as u said doesnt give u the right day sometimes... thanks again
both best of luck to all of us, thanks again :
13/12/2013 at 09:20
Thanks for your lovely comment....you are definitely right. It is sooo easy to say the words 'relax and it will happen' but in reality that is never going to happen. It is something we want so bad and after 6-7 months of trying you can't just switch those feelings off. I don't think I 'stress' about it as I don't do the whole charting etc but I definitely like to know where I am with my cycles. I think after Xmas I may look in to a fertility monitor tbh but I am just a bit worried about the cost of the sticks you need for it. I haven't looked too much in to it but I think I shall do some research.
My OH's test came back positive so all is good on that front
I think if you are struggling with reading the lines on the ovulation tests then you should maybe invest in the clearblue ones that show a smiley or no smiley. I just don't want to pay the prices for those each month so I shall keep going with the chepie ones. I must admit they can be a bit confusing at times but I tend to see the test line get darker over 2/3 days so I know when my positive is...I take pictures to compare them them too.
I don't really believe in the whole spiritual stuff and card reading but my mum had her cards read the other day and they said to her that she isn't a Grandma yet but she will be this time next year....lets hope they are right xx
14/12/2013 at 07:14
yer might give the clear blue ones a go see how that goes but other than that just stay positive and see how it goes, as for the cards and spirt stuff I wanted to go get a ready done but I'm sorta on the fence about it all, but figures crossed that she is right about this time next year for u
14/12/2013 at 08:25
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