Getting Pregnant <
Trying to conceive
04/03/2014 at 09:09
... either asking when the baby is on the way or why there is no baby on the way? My cousin, who is 39 and never had a boyfriend/moved out of home, told my sister that she was going to buy me baby clothes as a gift. Only a very close set of people know that we're trying and she is definitely not one of them. I find it rude and quite intrusive. When I last saw her she asked me "so when are you gonna start sprogging?" - I think that is quite a vulgar way to ask, NOT that it's any of her business anyway!
Sigh. Just wanted a little rant as I am getting a couple of comments at work as well. Does anyone else have to deal with this?
04/03/2014 at 09:29
Yes 100% fed up of this as well. We've ended up telling a few people now just to stop the questions as like you, I don't know what to say when asked.
I can't believe your cousin said that!!
04/03/2014 at 09:39
I don't get it too badly I have to admit. I've not long started a new career so I mainly work with people much younger at a different life stage to me and I think a lot of other family and friends think its likely we'll wait a while while I settle in. However, I don't think I'll be able to keep it from my mum and sister too long- my sister has a 4 month old and we've always talked (prompted by me too) about when I have one too- I'm now regretting that as theyre going to carry on that conversation and now I've started ttcing it suddenly doesn't seem as easy as it did before! I probably will tell them before long but I just don't want to put them through a monthly 'has she got exciting news' cycle (also I want to surprise them!!)
Who have you told you are ttcing?
04/03/2014 at 11:20
That's horrible, sorry shes being so insensitive.
Should just turn it around on her and ask when shes going to get a bf or move out.. she would soon stop asking lol
04/03/2014 at 11:28
Wow, that's horrible - I agree with CC - turn it on her and see how quick she is to answer!
04/03/2014 at 16:29
We've told my brother and sister-in-law, who we're very close to, plus two of my closest friends. Others may have guessed but if they ask I tell them they'll have to wait and see.
We live in different countries so I don't have to encounter her that often but when I go home to the UK my mum sometimes drives us over there on the way back from shopping/eating/etc without any notice to me, which annoys me.
I also get annoyed with people saying "well just wait until you have kids, THEN you'll know what no sleep is like!" but I think that's me being a bit over sensitive perhaps!
04/03/2014 at 17:17
I'm sick of this too, and having to pretend that having a baby would be a nightmare or that I'm waiting to finish my studies. I'm getting fed up of lying to people
06/03/2014 at 18:03
Yes, I get asked all the time. Yesterday at work someone said "you're married and settled in your house, you should really think about having kids!" Wow what an excellent idea, it had never even occurred to me...
06/03/2014 at 21:53
She is very insensitive, but sadly I don't think it's unusual to be asked such things. I got quite good at changing the subject when asked when we were starting a family or baby making soon eh? Nudge nudge wink wink.when we moved house lots of people assumed it was because I was pregnant, because for what other reason would people move?!
Now I'm pregnant I get 'what took you so long?' And 'we thought you'd never get on with it'. People just don't get it unless they have had experienced problems in trying. As a society we have it drummed into us as teenagers that doing it once without protection will result in a baby so people just assume that is true.
10/03/2014 at 12:17
Absolutely - depending on the day, sometimes I was able to make a joke, other days I felt like punching them.
I usually replied with 'Ive a dog who is my baby and she wipes her own bum!' Generally shut people up.
The questions dont stop once you are pregnant - Ive been asked if it was planned! I said 'thats a very personal questions and none of your business'.
Some people are just thoughtless assholes.
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