Getting Pregnant <
Trying to conceive
15/08/2012 at 16:55
hello ladies x
i hope you are all okay.. i am hoping someone can shed some light for me as i have a few questions!
i found out that i had a mmc when i went for my 16 week check and they couldn't find a heartbeat, they think my babys heart must have stopped beating shortly after the 12 week scan.. so probably around 13weeks. i then went on to have medical management to induce my miscarriage at hospital.
anyway i am a month further down the line now. i have been very lucky in that AF showed up exactly 4 weeks after the miscarriage so hopefully my regular 28 day cycles will come back... well my main question is when can we try again??? there is so much conflicting advice! a doctor at my work said to wait for one period, my friend said 3 months, and i've seen things online that say 3 periods.... basically i just need advice from people going through the same thing i think i started taking folic acid on sunday (CD1)...
anyway hpe someone could give me a little advice xxx
15/08/2012 at 19:34
15/08/2012 at 20:16
Thanks hun x
I guess it is just a matter of when I feel ready again then. I feel the same like I need to look forward to something. I do feel like I will never be happy until I have my baby in my arms. At the same time I still feel a lot of grief for the little one we have lost so maybe I do need a little more time.
Thanks for the info though it is sooo confusing all the different opinions and advice out there! x x Wishing you lots of luck with the TTC x
15/08/2012 at 20:24
15/08/2012 at 20:30
Hi Ladies, can I join you.
We've found out today that there's no heartbeat for our little bean at 8w6days, very sad as we had a really good strong heartbeat at 7w3d so we thought all was well.
Can't really believe I am already on TTC forums again planning for next one.
Due to see the consultant tomorrow to discuss options and then I fully intend to try again immediately - last baby was a clomid baby so I need the doctors to agree to us trying again so we get the prescription. Fingers crossed.
15/08/2012 at 20:41
15/08/2012 at 20:45
15/08/2012 at 20:50
15/08/2012 at 21:27
16/08/2012 at 15:01
Thanks everyone. So sorry to hear about all your mcs, its just so sad and unfair when these are such wanted babies.
I had my appt today and everything is confirmed and D&C booked for tomorrow. Had to go down to the antenatal unit for my pre op checks - you'd think they'd have somewhere else for the desperately sad women to go where they're not confronted by the heavilly pregnant happy ones. That said, I only have praise for the hospital and all the staff, they have been fantastic.
We've been on a long journey to get here and only able to conceive with the help of the fertility clinic, they've already made another appt for end of August to see the consultant and I think I'll be able to start again straight away.
Mat Unit has always got 5 or 6 heavilly pregnant women standing outside smoking, I wish them no harm but it makes me so angry I can hardly breathe.
Baby dust for all of us x
16/08/2012 at 17:28
Oh Froggy hope tomorrow goes as well as it can do x
I know what you mean when I went for the management of my miscarriage I had to go to the delivery unit. It was heartbreaking.
Oh god as for the smoking pregnant ladies, it makes my blood boil. I work in the nhs and am confronted by such things most days it is very difficult not to get cross inside.
Today I had my first really bad day in a while. Had an angry patient on the phone who went on to say I had no idea how hard life can be. Finished the phone call and burst into tears! Have so far been really good at work but I just couldn't hold it in. I know strangers don't know what we have been through, and why should they? BUT I am always so careful with what I say because no one ever knows what people are dealing with/going through. Ahh well must carry on x
Will be thinking of you tomorrow Froggy x x
17/08/2012 at 11:28
18/08/2012 at 18:08
Thank you so much for all the messages of support everyone. The D&C went as a well as can be expected. First on the afternoon list and out by 5pm. Everyone was really sensitive. I feel suprisingly okay - apart from the occasional flood of tears in tesco/the kitchen/brushing my teeth, when does that wear off?
MrsAsh, your phone call sounds awful, it is so difficult when people are so insensitve and think they are the only people with problems. Why can't people remember that none of know what other people are going through so everyone needs to just make an effort to be decent to everyone else! You should have told your patient to bog off!
I was in the lift heading to the gynae suites yesterday and there was a pregnant couple looking really miserable in the lift. All I could think was "what have you got to look miserable for". And then they got out of the lift and went along to the foetal investigation medicine unit, so I felt pretty bad. Just goes to show eh?
Stripey, gemgems and MrsAsh - do you mind me asking when you felt ready to start/started trying again and what your doctors recomended? The surgeon told me I needed to wait 3 cycles - not sure I can manage that long. As I'm under the fertility specialist I think I will ask him, have an appt at the end of the month. I am pretty hopeful that the pregnancy will have kick started my system and maybe I won't need the drugs this next time.
My main goal is to be in a well established pregnancy by my EDD, I think it would be difficult to go through that (it's also my hubby's birthday) if I weren't pregnant. Fingers crossed.
18/08/2012 at 19:50
18/08/2012 at 22:18
Glad to hear you are out the other side now hun, at least you are no longer in limbo cus i know how awful that is after a MMC..
Regarding trying again as StripeySocks has said above they tend to say one cycle for dating reasons but unless you have had a specific medical condition/cause for your MC then there is no evidence to suggest you should wait longer. The miscarriage assosciation and my 'what to expect when you are expecting' book both advise one cycle. And so did one of the drs at my work.
I have just finished my AF so plan on taking it easy this month we wont use contraceptives but wont actively try.. I have a consultant appointment early next month just as a follow up, we had tests carried out on the placenta where they can sometimes pick up genetic conditions etc that may effect future pregnancies or give us a cause for this MC. The after care I have received from the hospital has been brilliant.
It feels strange to say but I do feel ready to try again I never thought I would say that so soon to the point where it makes me feel a bit guilty it is all so confusing.
How is everyone doing? x x
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