I struggled to bf my 1st,he was big and I was anaemic too.I had little or no help and gave up by 3 months,partly due to that and also social/work pressure.With my 2nd I managed to bf,but with one formula/baby rice feed from 10 weeks,big no no on the baby rice but it worked for us.3rd I breastfed exclusively,she was a big baby,75 percentile born,her weight fell to the 11th percentile because I listened to hv telling me how fantastic it was I was bf number 3 blah,blah.As soon as I put her on formula,suprise,suprise she grew again.Number 4 I did mostly bf but also formula once a day,and he grew fine.5TH stopped bf at 3 months cos she stopped growing,6th stopped after a month because he stopped growing.This time I tried bf for a few days but I could see he wasn't getting anything.I was anaemic,I had an infection,he was jaundiced and I was being told he needed extra fluid to help clear that,and he was fairly big,I ended feeding constantly,sore nipples and I gave up when I saw my blood in his spit up.
In most cases I didn't find the hvs /mws that helpful.I was just told all women can bf,we all have enough milk,and if feeding is painful you're not doing it right.Which just leaves you feeling guilty and a failure if you give up.
This time,I told them what I was doing.I told them he's having formula,why he's having formula,and I'm not going to feel guilty.And they were fine with it.Which is good cos I wasn't asking their permission.
Breastfeedings great when it works,but when it doesn't we shouldn't be made to feel guilty.There isn't a great deal of useful support out there.I think a lot of hvs just follow the current guidelines,and they don't have the time to help everyone who needs it