Christmas is such an exciting time for children, with the build-up, the decorations, the planning and then the opening of the presents on the day itself. But too much excitement can be overwhelming – perhaps even scary – for young minds trying to absorb all the sights, sounds and emotions of the festive season. That’s why your toddler starts crying just when you think he’s having a marvellous time. He’s thinking, “It’s all too much for me!”
Sobbing at Santa time
To understand why your child’s laughter suddenly turns into tears in the middle of Christmas excitement, look at it from his point of view:
Excitement
Your toddler can’t stay excited all of the time; in between moments of very high excitement, he may feel quite low – and hence his fragile moods.
Anticipation
He may be worried he won’t get what he wants or he could be disappointed with the gifts he actually receives.
Tiredness
Half the fun of Christmas for young children is staying up later than usual, but tiredness soon begins to make them emotionally volatile.
On display
With so many visitors to your house, it’s as if your toddler is permanently on display. Although he loves being the centre of attention, too much attention is stressful.
Confusion
All year he’s told not to talk to strangers, yet now you actively encourage him to sit on the knee of a scary old man with a white beard and a red outfit!
How to turn off the tears
You can help your child enjoy Christmas by trying to keep him calm. Naturally you want him to be filled with excitement in the run-up to the big day – after all, that’s part of the fun – but always be prepared for that excitement to turn to tears. Be ready to soothe him when that happens.
Expert Tip
Try to help him achieve an emotional balance. Calm him when you can, without dampening his spirits altogether .
Dr Richard Woolfson, Psychologist
By all means, let him prattle on as much as he wants about the different presents he expects, and about the various parties he thinks he’ll be going to. But try to help him achieve an emotional balance. Calm him when you can, without dampening his spirits altogether. That way he always thinks, “This is great fun.”
Another important point is to make sure that his expectations are realistic. His Christmas list is probably enormous, containing everything he could possibly want. Gently explain that he can’t get everything, and ask him to select the top two or three items from his list that he most wants. He may be unhappy to start with because such choices can be difficult for a young child. But it’s better to tackle this issue early on and avoid tears and tantrums on Christmas morning.
Getting involved
Your young child will be less likely to have tantrums or misbehave if he feels like he’s part of things, so get him involved in the preparations. Even at this young age, he can help you choose decorations for the tree, or arrange the display of cards that your family receives. This harnesses his involvement, keeps him occupied, and reduces the likelihood that the whole experience becomes too much.
