The small parenting wins UK mums and dads say matter more than exam results and awards

Parents may spend years worrying about exam results and big milestones, but new research suggests it’s the small everyday moments that really stay with us.

A new poll of 2,000 UK parents has revealed that the moments mums and dads feel most proud of are often the small acts of kindness, confidence and resilience that happen day to day, from hearing a child say “please” and “thank you” without prompting to watching siblings play happily together with no screens in sight.

The study, commissioned by children’s snack brand Once Upon a Farm, found that almost all parents, 95%, believe everyday moments of thoughtfulness and resilience mean more than headline achievements like top grades or sporting success.

The small moments that parents cherish the most

Topping the list of “small parenting wins” was seeing a child confidently tell a story or joke in front of a group of people, with 55% of parents saying it made them proud.

Close behind was hearing children use good manners without being reminded, with 54% saying a spontaneous “please” or “thank you” feels like a major parenting achievement.

Other standout moments included:

• Seeing children happy outdoors and jumping in puddles, 48%
• Watching them clear plates away at someone else’s house without being asked, 47%
• Hearing a child say “thank you for having me” to another parent, 44%
• Watching them keep trying after getting something wrong, 43%
• Seeing them stand up for someone being teased at school, 41%

Parents also said they love seeing signs of empathy and inclusion, including comforting upset friends, sharing toys and inviting new children into playground games.

Kindness matters more than academic success

The findings suggest many families are redefining what success looks like for children.

While academic and sporting achievements still matter, 87% of parents said they would rather their child grew up kind than academically gifted.

When asked which traits they most want to encourage in their children, kindness topped the list at 80%, followed by honesty, empathy and independence.

Dr Maryhan, psychologist and host of the podcast How Not To Screw Up Your Kids, said the research reflects a wider shift in parenting priorities.

“The findings highlight a shift in what modern families value," she says. "Parents are redefining success with moments that reflect independence, empathy and confidence like your toddler confidently trying olives at a café, or your teen making you a cup of tea just because.”

Academic and sporting achievements are wonderful, but character, kindness and connection are what endure into adulthood.

Teen parenting wins look very different

While parents of toddlers celebrated milestones like reading independently or sitting nicely at the table, parents of teenagers said their proudest moments often came from connection and thoughtfulness.

For many, the ultimate teen parenting win was hearing “How was your day?” from their child.

Other standout moments included:

• A teacher describing their child as a role model, 39%
• A hug in front of their friends, 35%
• Having a real conversation about their day, 27%
• Watching them tidy up without being asked, 48%

The research also found that parents feel proud of their children an average of 16 times a week, despite 80% admitting parenting can feel challenging at times.

Why parents are celebrating everyday wins

For many families, the findings will feel reassuring in a world where parenting advice and social media can often focus on big achievements and packed schedules.

Instead, the poll suggests parents are placing more value on raising children who are kind, resilient and emotionally aware.

Cassandra Curtis, founder of Once Upon a Farm, said: “We see every day how food and family routines create opportunities for these small but powerful wins, from adventurous eating to sitting down together and talking. Those are the moments that really count.”

And judging by the research, many parents would agree that a child confidently ordering olives at a café or remembering to thank another parent can feel just as rewarding as a gold star certificate.